~(^_^)~

haiz....

2009-11-22T13:55:00.000+08:00

Been a while for me to update this blog, I was wanted to write but I thought that wasn't the right time for me to do it. Many things happened in this few weeks. Happy or sad or angry or disappointment, every single elements of feeling is there..

I know I'd been keep quiet and tolerance for a long time. I don't voice out my piece of anger doesn't mean I don't know how to angry. I know my existence is somethings beneficial to you all, even though the word "friend" mention by you all was like the honey dropping into the sea. I know my own weakness, that's I'll treat every single friend equal, unless they really care for me. I thought 3 of you were, but it was disappointing me... Yet I m still so stupid to follow and obey every single "order" you all requested. I know I've been too soft-hearted, which I don't really sure I can change it. I always mentioned that I'm half blind when I don't wear specs, but it doesn't mean that you all thought I'm an idiot who don't know everything. I don't mention doesn't mean that I don't know. I'm happy that my brain still work well. I still able to read yours eye... I know every single crap you all saying about me. I don't want to tear off your face, but I just wanna ask, I already fulfill things you ask me to do without any complaints. Just why 3 of you still couldn't satisfied with it and still have to shoot me at behind???

I see everything clearly even though my eye sight was bad. But don't look down on my estimation, prediction and my brain!

I truly wanna apologize to someone. Sorry!!! I know I'm the one who always hurt you, but you are always there to protect me and make sure I'm in the right track. When you're around I feel safe, still you're no longer there for me. Be sure you happy with her oh. I'll become such soft-hearted partly because of you are over protected me until I forget the dark side of human... But don't worry, I woke up after 1 year of pampering... ha-ha... I wanted to hold you and don't want to let the feeling gone, but too bad I gave up already. I wanted to have the feeling for loving you back, but it just impossible.

I'm afraid I will fall back the same darkness again. I don't want to move forward anymore, I scared of the hurt again. If the one there is truly liking me or whatsoever, walk to me and show me your sincerity. I'm too tired for guessing and forecasting.

1st post for Nov

2009-11-16T00:45:00.002+08:00

Since I started my new blog, I think this is the 1st time I update tis blog. Well, if you ask me the difference between these two blogs, I can tell you that you hardly find essay form or my daily relevant issue at my secondary blog. Because I want to keep my piece of work there, when I have some ideas or cues for poem or short text, they can be found there.

Seriously, already 1 month never step in. But for the past 1 month I had succeed to accomplish the things and goals I want to achieve. For example, from now on, I draw a line between me and him. The Him that I always mention in the past passages. Because finally I dare to give up, I want to be free and I think it's time for me to get a new life rather than rotting at the one that I couldn't get him at all.

After all, somethings that I couldn't deny was the safety feeling when he was beside me. I know both of us aren't couple, although in everyone's eye we look like couple. But seriously NO. I appreciate what he did for me and I thank him for giving such an impressive and memorable flashback and memories. I know he was my everything but now he is nothing much to me...

But as friend, I sincerely hope that the one he love really will be there for him. I don't hope to see his sad face which I know he will only show it to me among friend.

For the previous moments, I was afraid to let other know that I was in love with him. Of cos with his capability and his sincere, many girls may mad at him. However, if someone ask me about it, I will admit it and it's past tense for me. Many friends ask me before why there are so many universities and I will choose Utar, question also included why I don't want to stay Penang... Below are the answers you all waiting for, I leave my beloved hometown is because of him. I want to give up and I want to run away from the reality for seeing the bees beside him. For whose sake I came here, of cos... him again. But what I wanted to stress here is THAT's PAST TENSE ALREADY!!!

I face the reality here, I came to Kampar, I must try my best to adapt and fit myself into this circle. Although I think my stage currently is remaining at failure stage~_~''' No idea why I keep repeating my mistake, but sometime I know I was too depend on him last time. Too protective...hahaha...

Ok~ share more 2mr

Cherish Blossom~

2009-10-05T18:45:00.003+08:00

I had create another new blog~ I think i will be more active at that blog~

Please Click Me to visit it...

http://lavelovelave.blogspot.com..

Hope to see you there ;)

No more...

2009-10-01T23:37:00.002+08:00

My first post after I had been busy + lazy...

Well, october now... I think I won't update my blog by writing those crap anymore. As I insist to erase and forget everything that have been happened recently.

"Never let someone become your everything, or else once that person gone, you will leave nothing but endless sadness and pain." I came back from Kampar few days already, it is our university's holiday. From 24/9 to 18/10/09, before I come back to Penang. I promise myself, this time I wouldn't be so kind and soft-hearted anymore. I want to abandon the unrequited love away. Since now I think I'm really wake up from the dream and back to reality.

After a long thought, finally I realize it's useless to wait without telling him my feeling, but I didn't intend to tell him anymore. Only solution, drops it and get new one. I don't declare war that I know I will lose in the end. Nothing I can blame about too, it's fate.

I'm trying my best to forget his existence and trying to be independent without him (I know I always asked him to help out when I'm in trouble). But from now-on, I try to settle all of them by myself. Since before I get to know him, I'm live the way like that too. Just because his appearance make me weaken.

For those co-incidences or whatsoever fate that happened, I think that's the challenges given by god to test my ability. I accept this challenges and I'll definitely defeat it...

一生人的遗憾

2009-09-19T23:51:00.002+08:00

望着照片里朋友们那幸福灿烂的笑容
心里不禁酸溜溜的

他们欢喜

因为在那一生只有一次的二十一岁生日

他们过得很有意义

那个点燃了的蜡烛

留下的蜡

就像是我泪水

可能对别人而言

是我太执着了

一生人的年龄不会从来

可是我很希望那个最难忘的

是2009年的二十一岁生日

可惜希望换来的是一大堆我吭不下的失望

家人给的失望

朋友们给的没望

他给的绝望

真是够旺咯

好一句“Sorry la I 4gt de ma..."

永远在我人生擦不掉的黑点

永远在我活着时回不来的一天

你不属于我

2009-09-18T15:08:00.002+08:00

《你不属于我》

望着你的背影

是多么的熟悉

每天的我都会想念

那个眼里只有别个女生的你

每天的我都会祈祷

祈求你都平安如意

忙碌中的你

那一丝的笑容

多么的纯真

更是我黑暗世界里的一线光明

可是得到那笑容的代价

竟是我的悲伤

因为你不属于我的

你的责备是我的安慰

你的认真是我的动力

你的困扰是我的烦恼

但我的一切只是你身旁的一阵微风

你的关心只是纯粹随口而出

却是我永远最珍惜的在乎

我晓得她是你的唯一

我明白你不会有属于我的机会

但我相信我付出的不会比她少

我得到的

是从那不明的巧合中

所留下来的好奇

是你傻不了解我对你的情谊

还是你刻意装傻

这一切都不重要了

因为保持沉默是我的特色

爱你使我拥有最美丽的伤痕

爱过你是我选择在渺茫中画上一个句号

一个只是属于我的句号

The One that I worry about... still u...

2009-09-11T20:53:00.002+08:00

I didn't update my blog for some time. Partly because I'm quite lazy to update but main reason is I don't really want to remember what was happened this few weeks. Besides, life at Kampar was boring until nothing to write about.

I went back penang for a couple of week. Sometime I feel that I'm so emotional. I don't really know what do I want too... I love him yet I keep wanna give up, and some time I might be wondering is it loving him is just a habit? Want to see him once I get back to Penang is another one? I did many first time(s) after I get to know him. He changed me a lot though...

People quote that "Curious could kill a cat", but I think mine shall be "love can change rational individuals become a "full-jealousy" individuals". Or rather, "Jealousy could kill minds". I just can't help myself when I saw somethings that I wasn't hoping to see. I'm kind of sensitive person and I might be petty too. I hate being ignore and being alone. But it's nothing compare to see you being so kind to another girl. Of cause, I got no authority to criticize about it since I'm not your girl friend. I'm just a normal friend to you. I don't really mind that whether who am I to you too.

Since the day I know his daily life was so busy. I started to worry. I really worry that is he safe every time he drive? and he work until so late every night. Did he able to get enough rest? How did he study and do revision since he can be so tired until fall asleep at lecture class. Worst thing is when the lecturer called his name, he didn't noticed it and continue sleeping. How could he manage to take care his career + his studies + his club activities in the same time? I wrote here is because I can't tell him in real life because the same reason. No authority, and even I tell him about this, nothing change too since I understand he can't abandon anyone of them. What I can do is just keep praying for him...

1 more week to final exam. I haven't fully prepare yet>.<'' I hate exam ='(

SS501 coming to KL,malaysia...

2009-09-02T15:34:00.004+08:00

Date : 3/9/2009

Time : 6pm

Venue : One World Hotel, Bandar Utama, Petaling Jaya, Jasmine and Orchid Room, level C

Entry Requirement : Must purchase one of their albums at the respective venue in order to get in...

(Credit to triplesmy.com)

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

I can't make it to this one as it's too rush... Just hoping some of their fan would post the video clip~~ =D..

Because I'm Stupid (translated)

2009-08-31T01:18:00.011+08:00

~因为我太傻 Because I'm Stupid~

by ss501

Nae meoriga neomuna nappaseo
Neo hanapakke nan moreugo
Tareun sarameun pogoittneun neon
Ireon naema-eumdo moreugettji

Neoui harue naran eoptgettji
Tto chu'eokjoch'a eoptgettjiman
Neoman paraman pogoittneun nan
Chakku nunmuli heureugoisseo

Neoui dwaetmoseubeul poneungeotdo nan haengbokiya
Ajik naui ma-eumeul mollado
Kkeutnae seuch'ideusi kado

Niga neomu pogosip'eun nalen
Neomu kyeondigi himdeul naleneun
Neoreul saranghanda ipgae maemdola
Honja dasi tto CRYING FOR YOU
Honja dasi tto MISSING FOR YOU
Baby! I love you! I'm waiting for you!

Neoui harue nan eoptgettji
Tto kieokjoch'a eoptgettjiman
Neoman paraman pogoittneun nan
Honja ch'ueokeul mandeulgo isseo

Naegen sarangiran areumdaun sangch'eokat'a
Neoui yeppeun misoreul poado
Hamkke nan utjido mothae

Niga neomu saenggaknaneun nalen
Kaseum sirigo seulp'eun naleneun
Niga pogosip'ta ipgae maemdola
Honja dasi tto CRYING FOR YOU
Honja dasi tto MISSING FOR YOU
Baby! I love you! I'm waiting for you!

Bye, bye, never say goodbye
Ireohke chapji mothajiman
I need you amu maldo mothae I want you
Paraedo dasi paraedo

Niga neomu pogosip'eun nalen
Neomu kyeondigi himdeul naleneun
Neoreul saranghanda ipgae maemdola
Honja dasi tto CRYING FOR YOU

Niga neomu saenggaknaneun nalen
Kaseum sirigo seulp'eun naleneun
Niga pogosip'ta ipgae maemdola
Honja dasi tto CRYING FOR YOU
Honja dasi tto MISSING FOR YOU
Baby! I love you! I'm waiting for you!

(credit to genesis)

Translation (eng)

I’m really, very foolish

I know of no one other than you

you’re looking at someone else

yet you have no idea of my feelings like this

I won’t be in your days

I won’t be in the memories either, however

only you, I looked only at you

and the tears keep coming

As i watch you walking past, I’m still happy

even yet you still don’t know my heart

I should stop this and go

I really want to see the day

I’m with standing the pain each day

“I love you” is playing on my lips

Alone once again, crying for you

alone once again, missing for you

Baby, I love you, I’m waiting for you

I won’t be in your days

I won’t be remembered either, however

only you, I looked only at you

I’m making memories alone

Loving you is like having a beautiful wound

I look at your pretty smile also

but I cannot laugh with you

I’m thinking about you so much everyday

my heart is hurting in all these sad days

‘I want to see you’ is playing on my lips

alone once again, crying for you

alone once again, missing for you

Baby, i’m waiting for you, I love you

bye bye, never say goodbye

even though I cannot hold you like this

I need you, I cannot say anything more, I want you

I keep on hoping too, I’ll keep hoping….

I really want to see the day

I’m withstanding the pain each day

“I love you” is playing on my lips

Alone once again, crying for you

I’m thinking about you so much everyday

my heart is hurting in all these sad days

‘I want to see you’ is playing on my lips

alone once again, crying for you

alone once again, missing for you

Baby, i’m waiting for you, I love you (credit to genesis(bww2))

Translation (Mand)

当我看到你和他在一起

那就像一个晴天霹雳

我心痛地快要无法呼吸

难道你就这样离我远去嗯

如果你把感情当作游戏

我真的暂时承受不起

难道真爱永远遥不可及

可是我要如何把你忘记

难道不能继续

一段如此忧伤的旋律

揭开了那张虚伪的面具

跟着我唱悲伤歌曲 OH

因为太傻只会爱一个你

因为太傻只会想一个你

因为太傻只能欺骗了我自己

对不起只能 Crying for you

别忘记真的 Missing for you

Baby ! I love you !

Im waiting for you!

当我看到你和他在一起

那就像一个晴天霹雳

我心痛地快要无法呼吸

可是我要如何把你忘记

难道不能继续

一段如此忧伤的旋律

揭开了那张虚伪的面具

跟着我唱悲伤歌曲 (NO) OH

因为太傻只会爱一个你

因为太傻只会想一个你

因为太傻只能欺骗了我自己

对不起只能 Crying for you

别忘记真的 Missing for you

Baby ! I love you !

Im waiting for you!

Bye bye never say good bye!

我只希望你还有真爱

I need you 心里面只有你 I want you

我希望你能明白

因为太傻只会爱一个你

因为太傻只会想一个你

因为太傻只能欺骗了我自己

对不起只能 Crying for you

因为太傻只会爱一个你

因为太傻只会想一个你

因为太傻只能欺骗了我自己

对不起只能 Crying for you

别忘记真的 Missing for you

Baby ! I love you !

Im waiting for you! (credit to the translator)

__________________________________________________________________________

Oh well, I watched Boys Over Flower and I like this song very much... Especially the meaning of the song... So I would like to share here =)... Well, enjoy =)

I am who I am...

2009-08-30T02:11:00.002+08:00

I came back to Penang yesterday~ Was quite happy to come back since Kampar really boring even I had stay there for 3 months plus, I'm still unable to get use the "boring-ness" there...

I went to petrol station and I notice a brand new type of petrol, yellow color 1... Rm1.75 per liter. Quite shock and I thought it is the some sort of petrol which is cheaper than the regular one. But since I paid, I decide to try it.. OK! the comment was awesome.. although it can't compare with V-power, it is consider quite powerful petrol and the most important one is it's really save a lot. Normally from Kampar to Penang, it took me around Rm30 plus but this time was lesser... Just around RM20-25...

I reach Penang at 1130am and found out that Penang was raining too. Just like the current Kampar. I thought I can feel the sun here but sadly NO. I came back in the wrong timing since my brother, mum and dad was not around. No lunch prepared either, luckily someone willing to accompany me to fetch my friend to tuition center and then went to Gurney Plaza there had our lunch around 3pm. Only 2 of us and I start wondering, since when that we have no topic to talk about. When we sit down and read the menu, after ordering the food, it's like nothing to talk and chat between both of us. I don't really like or dare to stare at him since it's so awkward. However, I know he might be trying to find topic and he smiled. =)...

Dinner time I went Gurney again with Ms.Je and we had dinner at Sakae. The computer at our table was "sot plugged". It was duplicate our order, the fried maki... from the original 1 order become 11... really wth... after that we go to MCD greenlane, it's full parked and no choice left. We headed on to Gurney one. The weather was so cold yesterday.

Today it's raining too. But isn't as cold as yesterday, I had dinner at Johnny with rush since we are late to fetch Ms.Je's mum. After that we hang out with William, his gf and him. I don't know why that every time I come back, I will keep wanted to ask him out for this and that. He like to murmur me but still I feel that if he is around, I will feel safe and happy. But no matter how, love definitely unable to step in, because I can't afford to lose him... even as friend. I won't tell him those nonsense too... =)

You're still my best piggy ^^

2009-08-25T00:31:00.003+08:00

I was absent to law class today ='(... because I was oversleep!!!!!

My lunch was simple... So simple until I feel like sweating lol...

Porridge plus a piece of salty tofu and few piece of lettuces...

I was very happy today. The one I deeply loved previously find me today. And always when I was really really down, he will like the meteor, suddenly pomp out and greet me hi. Today he chat a lot with me. It's good since he and his girlfriend are still doing well =), glad to hear that.

I miss the time we were together, that time my life was peaceful and nice. Almost 2 years we spent and luckily we are still friend now. After that 2 years, we seldom contact each other but he will suddenly pomp out and usually I was having hard time or sad one. His messages is powerful enough to cheer me up. XD...Sorry for my mistake last time... Big fat ben dan piggy, hope you doing well and happy always o... Small piggy here will be always pray for you=)

Besides that, I found and chat with an old friend too. A cute boy-ish girl, or known as handsome~ lol... She is doing well too, I m glad everyone is fine. Thanks god for giving me such a time to meet up and chat with those I lose contact with today, or else I think I was unable to smile back these days...

The truth is I'm not excluded too...

2009-08-24T00:27:00.002+08:00

Sometime I don't know why I'm so sentimental to think about what the dramas or movies were trying to tell me... Somehow by watching it, the drama I watched currently... I said that the girl was stupid enough, yet when I think deeply... Wasn't or I should say Isn't I'm the same?

My friend said that human are hopeless and stupid, always don't treasure the one that caring and love you but trapped own self's love into someone who is not appreciate your love. I agreed with it since it was and it is happening on myself. But sometime, fate is playing with us. So-called " there's no such things as co-incidences, everything was controlled by fate". But why fate are playing fool with me by giving me so much of "co-incidences".

I know I'm lacking of courage in telling the truth to the one I really care and like. I just hope everything is the same as now.. Even he care me or pretend to care me when seeing me, or he do real care about me or whatever, please... remain the same. I don't want it to be any further or backward. Many of them doesn't understand why I refuse to tell the truth, is because I'm a coward. I scare losing him once I tell him. Yea, maybe he would accept it and going any further. But one day when relationship broke down, I'm gonna lose him, the chance to chat, the care words and maybe even the chance to see each other.

I just hope he could care about me, remember I was and I am existed. And allow to know his recent thinking and thought. That's enough... Once again I agreed that, I am the stupid human too... Sorry

I like the way....now

2009-08-18T01:20:00.002+08:00

I was quite tired this few days, but I enjoy these...

Saturday and Sunday I watched 2 movies~ On His Majesty's Secret Mission and G.I.Joe... I like the movies and they are awesome man!!!! love them <3

Today was the main issue here. Well, my mum "catch" us to Kim Gary to eat lunch. She like that curry seafood puff-look things. I'm not really like it since I feel that the taste isn't that good. After that, I have to fetch my housemate to Bus Station and have to reach there by 6.30pm. At first, no ppl able to accompany me. So I asked him, he made it, but late~=.='' His "traffic Light excuse" again lol. Before that I was blur, I bang the lamp post when I wanted to reverse... Right in front his house lol=X...

I thought that we were about to late for the time as the bus will depart at 630pm, I let him drive since I'm not familiar with the ways at Butterworth. He keep murmuring that we 100% can't make it since the ways along the bridge was jam like hell. Luckily we make it and reach at 630pm sharp! After that we went back and met up with Louis's, having a so-called dinner at somewhere near his house. I didn't eat any of them, just drink a glass of water. And we were plan to hang out at 10pm to Bed Cafe, where I tease him with that girl's name. Louis was ffk-ed me as I expected, luckily Ms.Je free and both of us went 1st since that busy fellow will late. We gossip alot..XD

That girl was working there tonight, she was so "fake"..! I just don't believe that she can't see me when she was serving other customer, so fake la!!!! stupid one! Once she saw he came, she only come to serve us and throw out a excuse, "wow, you're here? I didn't see you just now lol"... Sweatness. But I guess victory still on my side =)... We went to Mc. D and chat a lot.

I just don't understand, why he don't like my H........ Hmm, he is like protecting me or don't ever like to see them or whatever. However, I appreciate what he done today. Because of accompany me, he miss out his stuffs. Sorry=X... And thanks =)

Pretty tired friday~

2009-08-15T20:19:00.002+08:00

7am I departed from Kampar and before heading to Penang, we went to have breakfast at new town there, the "zhu qiong fan" isn't as good as the one I ate before, anyway it's still fine. The worst thing is the coffee, so bitter and taste bad... >.<''

Around 8am we start our journey back to Penang. This time one of my housemate follow me back to Penang as our hostel will be empty at this weekend. Everyone is going back home or go travel. I was so sleepy when driving along the highway, however I must concentrate since 4 ppl were in my car.

We reach around 10am and I bring my housemate when to Queensbay. We ate lunch at Johnny Restaurant. Night time I was planning to go to Gurney Drive to eat those hawker food, the god is playing me! When we just order drink, the rain start to fall... zzz.. We run back to the Plaza. I called Louis and other come out. Even though I was angry that fellow, I still unable to control and had msg him asked him to come over. But my messages were quite impolite, however he did make it. He come at last and I feel sorry when see him, he looks so tired, like an undead... He was just finish working. But he smile, I like that smile =)...

to be continue o...

Going back to Penang

2009-08-13T17:41:00.002+08:00

As I mention above, tomorrow which is friday I will back to Penang at 7am. Estimate will reach at 9am or 10am...

Hopefully those can bear yours manner and attitude, you know who you are though.. If don't like then just don't come out meet me that's all... Don't pull a long face when see me or you can choose to leave..

Estimate will back to Kampar at Wednesday afternoon. Time unknown..

"Incredible's" Feeling...

2009-08-12T16:34:00.002+08:00

From the day I went go KL, back from KL to Penang and finally back to Kampar...

I don't feel happy even for a single second...

I can't even get to smile or laugh from the bottom of my heart.

I bet no one want to have a 21st birthday like this,

Yea, It was past tense, why do I care so much??

Of cause I care!

Because of this birthday,

I found the truths that I had been search for some time..

1st, from last time till now, I m just a fool for trusting them so much

I thought if I treat them with my heart, they will treat the same way back to me..

However they don't..

2nd, I thought he wouldn't forget my birthday and I can spend my birthday eve with him, even just dinner.. And I thought every things before.

But in the end of the day, I enjoyed the disappointment very well with a washing face by tears.

Finally I know that, to him, I am just nothing..

Even he know I am angry for what he did(did nothing)..

He didn't even bother about that, ignore it and just leave it there... UNTIL TODAY! didn't even a msg or call...

Yea, again the unlimited free one is bullshit again!

Lavy, when only you will wake up??

He treat u like a tool only! Now you're a useless tool to him already...

Why you want to love this kind of guy since the earlier day you promise yourself you won't fall to a young kid like him?

Things he know to do are keep hurting you and piercing you heart like no tomorrow...

He may have treat you better sometime, but that is because he was in good mood...

Why did you trust your ex-colleagues and confirmed that they will treat you like the way you treat them??? Never let you guard down anymore please... Not everyone deserved to gain your trust and care.

Don't let the one-way love that you did towards him blind your own eyes...

If ever he ask to be forgiven, I'll tell him, please wait me reborn again then I'll forgive you all..

And I swear I don't want to be as soft and kind as ever again, no more mercy to you all... I hate to feel ever get hurt and tons of disappointment from you guys again.

And I don't think I got the "authority" or my energy to love you anymore, Mr. Busy man...

Unwanted Birthday

2009-08-09T23:55:00.002+08:00

Concluding the day from 6/8 to 9/8,

only 1 word to be describe --> Sucks!

My birthday was 7th August,

and I was expected more on the eve...

However,

what's waiting me was tons of disappointments...

6/8 was fine since the only 1 person

accompany me for the eve...

Asking myself don't cry because

maybe tomorrow's will be better...

7/8, fully of anger and disappointment

Although a lot of those game friends remember my birthday,

Thanks to them too...

the one I keep waiting for...

doesn't appear, not even wishing me by messages..

Only wish me when I sent a message to him

I was really sad... I understand and know

What's the feeling being forgotten by the one I care and love

It was the 2nd day I washed my face with tears...

This is not the 21st birthday I was wishing for...

If I get chance to change what I wanted to change,

the first one to be choose is

I don't want get to know someone like him, the one i care and love now...

I would give up every things to exchange that you know?

What you gave me were more on pains and hurts...

I'm blaming myself and the gods,

Why Must I get into this job and get to know you...

Lastly, thanks for those that remember my birthday one... I appreciate yours wishes. Thanks Ms. Je for the cute blackie(cat or puppy i m not sure@_@''), I got things to hug in Kampar liao!!!!!!

And thanks to my housemates, Kevin, Queenie, Yizhi, Yiteng and Zhenqii for the surprise birthday short celebration, cake and the diamond key... It was the only cake and key I had in my 21st Birthday.

Thanks my parents for giving me the 700 bucks platinum necklace.. I like it...

Really disappointed that the one I know less than 3 month remember my birthday and give me a great surprise, but the one I know near 1 year that I always hang out with forgotten my birthday until I need to remind him... the unlimited free calls and sms are like bullshit...

For memories...

2009-08-06T00:04:00.002+08:00

I seldom update my blog because I was busy with my assignments and coursework..

I was back to Penang at previous saturday, I thought I can go back at 5pm with him... But due to some of them wanted to visit Utar and the lake. So around 730pm only i start driving back from Kampar. along the highway I was so nervous, because I was alone although they are around me but different cars. Luckily he keep his distance, not staying too far with me.. I was quite happy actually. especially night time when i asked him whether to come MCD with me and Ms.Je...

I don't know whether I m too sensitive or hyper-thinking, but somehow i feel he quite care about my things.

Sunday I was going Gurney with Ms. Je and we had our lunch over Nandos, hmm... not really nice but still 100% better than kampar's food. I thought I won't see him that day. However, things surprise me at night time. When I was about to sleep, a call shock me up and I was quite dizzy that time, he asked me for supper... That's could count as the 1st time I sit on car that he drive. Very very very.... scary.... LOL! however, I feel happy bout that since I don't have to drive=)

Actually I feel that the words like " non of my business", "who cares"...etc, these words i didn't heard from him anymore. I m happy bout that too, but...

I wonder do he likes me? or just because he know that I like him so treat me better so that he won't hurt me? Hmm, I really don't know...

However, I know that I had hurt someone else there... Sry, I couldn't accept you since the one that I wish to be was someone else... I feel it's not fair if i accept u as my bf.... Cause I love him very much... But I didn't look forward to be with him any further, like now is enough for me. I don't wish and I cant accept it if he leave me or stay away from me... Please... Don't leave me

Good Bye IvaliceRO....

2009-08-03T03:10:00.006+08:00

I was quite shock when I get to know that IDT general gonna close down the server. Forever or what I'm not sure. But I guess no chance to be there either, since that incident.

However, I spend the last few hours on IvaliceRO. It will be a past soon. Thank to my ex-housemate for introducing me to play this server instead of continuing at Ero server. I get to know alot of friends there. Of cause, the few that really nice and sincere... I feel sad because the only place we can gather, chit-chat and playing around soon gonna be a past...

If not because of I joined this server 3 years ago, I guess my days gonna be grey and perhap not as colorful as now on.

What I m hoping is even though the server is dead, few of us move to another server which is host from chicago(not really sure). I hope the friendship between all of us wouldn't end here. I love you guys...

Here is those I specially want to thank them for helping me alot in my journey of Ivalice:

Mervin aka prawnie
Tomato

Chlorofille aka cicak

Tingster aka ting

Nikki

Allie

Elly

etc(those SG players)

Lego sama aka snow

Susu aka suzaku

Hou zi

MoneyEarner aka tommy

and alot more...(sry if miss out)

Before I logged out from that, I manage to take some ss...last few one.

Last few players which is alive and wanted to wait until the last moment before server close...

(Vic, Hou, Mervin, Me, Suzaku, Kim)

Proud to be "Malice" guild member...

and lastly...

My favourite emotion on RO.../e29... ^_^

Sweet time and sad moment I had at Ivalice. From 2006 to 2009, I am stick with it, earn cash from it(although not as much as some of them). But overall it's consider earning since not because of the cash, but the comradeship and the friendship I had and have... Thanks for my fate that decide my way to this server...

Sweet and happy time doesn't stay long...

2009-07-22T22:22:00.004+08:00

Continue from the bottom one....

Sunday in Penang~ I went to Gurney with Sharon in order to watch Ice Age 3. It's kind of late to watch this one since it released quite a while already. But still, I love it!!!! Wohoo, the little dinosour and the peaches inside were so cute! Actually I plan to watch at Queensbay one but since someone request me to go Gurney so I got no choice. One question from my friend, why I just can't refuse to follow what he request? Well, nice question. I don't even know why too... haha.. Night time around supper, I was out with Joyce to Mc.Donalds. We chit chat there, miss the day that I just stepped in my previous company's moment... Jokes and fun... Today I finally got my Iphone, thanks to Sharon so that I'm able to get it at lowest price~~=)

I watch Public Enemies at Monday with Ms.Je. It's not really that boring but it bring lots of meaning behind. The person you know for long and might be very friend to you somehow may betray you when he or she has no choice either to sacrifice his/her own benefit or yours. Even it may cost-up your life... However, I still prefer the Johnny Depp at Pirate of the Carribean. Monday was my lucky day, as I forget to bring my student card, but I was able to enjoy my steamboat meal with student price at Seoul Garden. And the movie ticket only RM1 difference between student price and adult. LOL... Around late night, I was hanging out with him and the other. We went to Mc.D again! Don't complaint it because Kampar don't have Mc.D you know?! I feel extremely happy that day. Mr.K told me that he might follow me to Kampar and yes he did.
Luckily he did of cause. Because I can't get good sleep these few days in Penang because I came back home late everyday.

Along the highway, I'm quite tired to drive actually. I insisted to continue driving after taking a short break but Mr.K want me to rest at passenger seat. So I just throw him the keys. I was quite nervous because that is the first time he drove my car. But surprisingly his driving was stable, what's a shame to me ='(...

Finally I m back to this lifeless place. Test is waiting me out there. Happy days was over and it's short...>.<''' However, I appreciated the 5 days I had when I went back... it will be part of my memories... =)

I am back to my lovely Penang

2009-07-19T03:08:00.002+08:00

Was few weeks for skipped the update on my blog.
Kind of busy due to my assignments and tests. Everything is still fine at Kampar.

I came back Penang on Thursday afternoon. Was quite happy because after the 3 weeks of "non-human" weeks, I was able to come back get some rest and relax. That night was going to dinner with ms. Je and supper was at MCD with Joyce and William. Someone had been FFK me again. But I understand, because he was busy with the set-up stuffs.

Friday, I was going to have my lunch with Ms.Je at around 5 because she had her "teeth-pressure" and our lunch was Secret Recipe's cake at Gurney Plaza. This place gave me some memories when I was going with him. He told me which cake he like and which one is nice. That time I didn't order the cake cause I dun wan him to misunderstanding. But I was order it at friday. Yup, i admit it was nice. =) I was happy when I received the phone call for the invitation to eat lunch together with him and another one. however, I can't go lol.
Friday night, I was going Yum cha with my ex-supervisor and other. My supervisor told me that she going to quit her job and moving to another dealer there, she even invite me to work with her when I m in holiday. I was happy to hear that since I know the company I work before no longer "friendly" enough to survive. Surprisingly, he talk alot of his current things to me. I feel like i had misunderstanding him. And until friday, I know that he pretend don't care but he do really care about me sometime. I m glad to know that, you know? but dun worry, nth more.

Today, as promised. I went to Queensbay and eat lunch with him n my bro- "Louis". We went to Wong KoK and eat. Luckily Ms.Je able to eat with her tooth. Or else I really plan to order ice cream for her again...hahaha... I was going out at night with Joyce, William and him. He is still the same, but somehow I feel he is like wanna chat with me all the time but because of other ppl around then he just keep quiet. I was quite dizzy today, and he notice that. I m happy that he noticed that. And today is my first time hearing him to ask me drive slowly. hehe...

to be continue ...

H1N1

2009-07-05T21:57:00.002+08:00

Sad to heard that one of my friend from USM have been proved that she get H1n1 today. Hopefully she can recover soon. Praying for her...

Wasn't here to update my blog for days. Was busying to prepare my Mid-term test. Today one of the paper named Quantitative Technique 2 finish tested. Hopefully it pass>.<'''
Last two day ago which is friday, I went dinner with one of my RO-friend again. Well, this is second time going dinner with him. Haha...

Everything is same, bored as ever...sigh...

I'm very stress with my current situation too. I hate studying In UTAR. I won't recommand any of my friends or relatives to this stupid University. Everything is below average. I got no choice but to stay here to be "torture". These few weeks I cant go back to Penang due to the stupid tests on next sat and sunday. Sad=(... I want to eat many many things in Penang. ='(

I wasn't await for the arrival of my birthday, it was because I think the one I wish to get his greeting wouldn't greet me for sure.

Wishes turned into disappointment...

2009-06-28T02:47:00.002+08:00

Few days never update my blog.

Yesterday I was going back to Penang but before that, I drove to KL to fetch my brother and his "property" back to Penang. Was departed at 2pm from Kampar and reached KL at 4pm. From KL, we departed at 7pm and reached Penang was already 1130pm. It's scary to drive back Penang through the Highway at night, you know? Only few parts of the highway are brighten with the roadside-lights, the rest is dark. Once reach I felt hungry and was asking someone to accompany me for dinner but I was very disappointed with that as that fellow giving me hope at first but spoil it at last. No choice but have to call the "sleepy" Ms. Je to accompany going to MCD to eat.

I wake up quite early as I was promised to go movie with Ms. Je and other friends. I had lunch at Sakae Sushi in rush and watched " Transformer" at evening time. That movie was awesome, I want to watch it again!!! It's great~~~~~ <3>

I went to Queensbay at night time in order to help my brother convert his prepaid to postpaid, I was happy to see my ex-colleagues and they were happy to see me too. From their information, someone had been promoted to be manager with basic salary of RM2.4k per month. I was like...wtf? I was hoping that this new is from his mouth but not other. But... sigh...

Originally wasn't plan to go out after back from Queensbay but they asked me to go to Gasoline, I met alot of new friends there and some of them are quite nice people. I went with Joyce and met William and his gf there, he come after a couple of minutes. When he reach, I felt that I don't want to speak with him, but why he come beside me and sit... I hoping he go to another side there. For no reason, I feel that I feel like he is a stranger to me now. I don't know what to talk with him, and it's like kind of weird. But he doesn't change, still the old idiotic person ever. He failed to be a guy, not even respect and take care of girls. Worst when 2 of ladies included me when to toilet, I thought he will wait for us that the entrance but when we came out, he was miles away from us. That place was so quiet and dark. All shops close de and nothings left.

I hate that alot. I hate guys that don't know how to protect or maybe most basic manner was to ensure the girls is in safe condition. He is one of them. Dam ass... I swear I won't asked him out again. Not even plan to telling him that I back to Penang next time.

A star... that gonna explode soon

2009-06-24T22:00:00.002+08:00

Was very tired and pressure over this few week, assignment, test and relationship. Thanks to all my assignment teammates that willing to co-operate with me in order to ensure the assignment is smooth-going.

Today's morning, I was skipped class because I was seriously headache and really looks bad. My housemate was very worry but luckily after I get some rest, I was able to attend my 1230pm class. I was slacking whole day for the sickness. Damn it=.='' I think it's because I didn't get enough sleep for few days. Everyday have to wake up early at 6-7am. That's mad to me. Plus the weather here is so "nice" until I fall in "sick" with it. Although yesterday it did rain here.

I was so blur until I thought today I suppose to go dinner with my friend. After she told is it is tomorrow and not today, then my first thinking is "DEAD! NO DINNER TODAY! NO FOOD EITHER!". No choice, last option, call delivery which is food that taste below average. I really doubt how's the people living in Kampar for years.

I saw his msn title message. Love's complicated and he hate it. Well, he is just like a star to me now. A blind one, a star that brighten ways for me and because of my careless, I fall in love with the star but sadly I was unable to reach him even I feel it's close to me. The star is even blind and deaf to know about my feeling toward him. What he concern is her... Even she is now in Penang. Yea, no doubt that's it. I wasn't and isn't waiting for his greet nor calls anymore. It had become less important for me now. Is less but not non, you know...

And to another fellow, thanks god... I think he had return the "peace" to me. I like the days without his interruption but somehow I miss his messages and actually I want to see how "handsome" he is as he said until can fly to hit the ceiling. Just that lots of my friends against my idea because to them he is harmful to me. See, human are weird aren't they? I'm one of the human too though....

I strongly agree and it's straight describe what I feel...

2009-06-24T19:46:00.003+08:00

Well, this is from email again. I feel it's meaningful and it's exactly describe how I feel these months....

Enjoy...

~每一个女孩的身边都有一个不是男朋友的男朋友~
~Each girl's side has one is not boyfriend's boyfriend~

但是，为了什么原因你们没能在一起？But, what's the reason for both of you unable to be together?
也许他为了朋友之间的义气，不能追你。 perhaps because of loyalty between friends, he's unable to reach you
也许为了顾及家人的意见，你们没有在一起。 perhaps because of his family's opinion, both of you unable to be together
也许为了出国深造，他没有要你等他。 or maybe because of going overseas for further studies, he don't want you to wait for him

也许你们相遇太早，还不懂得珍惜对方。Maybe it's too early for both of you get to know each other, unable to treasure the opposite party.

也许你们相遇太晚，你们身边已经有了另一个人。 Perhaps it's too late for both of you to meet each other, there's another person beside you already.

也许你回头太迟，对方已不再等待 maybe you turning back to the starting point too late, he doesn't want to wait anymore.

也许你们彼此在捉摸对方的心，而迟迟无法跨出界线。 Perhap both of you are ascertaining each other's heart, but still unable to step forward the demarcation line slowly.

不过即使你们没在一起，你们还是保持了朋友的关系。Even both of you aren't together, both of you still remain the relationship as friend

但是你们心底清楚，对这个人，你比朋友还多了一份关心。but you know it very well that, toward this person, you will care more than the other one.

即使不能跟他名正言顺的牵着手逛街，你们还是可以做无所不谈的朋友。Even though both of you didn't hold each other hand when hanging out, you still able to chat whatever-you-like topic with him/her.

他有喜欢的人，你口头上会帮他追，心里却不是很清楚你是不是真的希望他追到。He might be having someone that he love, you might tell him that you will help him to get the opponent, however, you will be unable to sure whether you are hoping him to get that one or not.

他遇到困难时，你会尽你所能的帮他，不会计较谁又欠了谁。When he facing difficulties, you will try your best in helping him without concerning about whose matter it is.

男女朋友吃醋了，你会安抚他们说你和他只是朋友，但你心中会有那么一丝的不确定。Boy/girl friends may jeolous, but you may comfort them by telling them he/she is just a friend, but there's uncertainty in you heart.

每个人这辈子，心中都有过这幺一个特别的朋友，很矛盾的行为。Everyone's heart may have/had a special friend , it's a very contradictory behavior

一开始你不甘心只做朋友的，但久了，突然发现这样最好。Starting, You will be not satisfy for just being a friend, but after that, you might feel that the situation now is the best

你宁愿这样关心他，总好过你们在一起而有天会分手。You would rather caring him/her that way than having "break-up" one day.

你宁愿做他的朋友，彼此不会吃醋，才可以真的无所不谈。You would rather be his/her friend, wouldn't feel any jeolousy at all, and to be able to chat freely.

特别是这样，你还是知道，他永远会关心你的。You will know that, he is care for you forever.

做不成男女朋友，当他那个特别的朋友，有什么不好呢？Unable to be couple, be a special friend for him/her, isn't just nice?

你心中的这个特别的朋友...? 是谁呢？Who's your special friend that living in yout heart?

很多的感情，都因为一厢情愿，最后连朋友都当不成了 In relationships, mostly is because of one-sided wishes, then unable to continue the friendship anymore.

常常觉得惋惜，可惜一些本来很好的友情 Always regret that it was a awesome friendship there

最后却因为对方的一句喜欢你，如果你没有反应，because of one telling you that he/she love you, if you don't have any reaction
这一段友情似乎也难以维持下去，这也难怪有些人会因此不肯踏出这一步 this friendship might be unable to last, that's why some people wouldn't try to follow this step

因为这就像是一场赌注，表白了之后不是成了男女朋友，要不就连朋友都当不成了。It's because this is a gamble, either after telling each other will become couples, or might be even end up losing a friend for that

有些事不是你能预料的，或许对方不在意，你们还可以是朋友，但却已经不如从前的好. There are somethings that you are unable to predict, even he/she doesn't care about it and continue as a friend, but it won't be as close as previous time.

====================================================================

I'm quite poor to translate chinese to english, so please bear it if any error or mistakes that I had made XD

Yea, I always feel it that way like the above statements. It's better continue as a normal friend than spoiling it and end up everything is back to the stranger point...

Stress and sad...

2009-06-22T23:11:00.002+08:00

For some reason, today I feel like... NO..I don't want to go back Penang. I don't want to face him, I don't know what I'll react too...

It is so sad get to know the latest new updated by one of my 38 friend. According to them, he got... Mean it's time for me to really wake up and let go everything. I was so stress about my assignment and tutorial stuffs, add up this "excited" stuff, I wonder how long I can bear it. I am in the mode which is like drawning inside the water and unable to breath anymore.

Everything is tough over here, Kampar. Thanks to the stupid UTAR management, with the flexible timetable, I wasn't able to have a fix classmate. End up I have to figure out about my group assignments things. I done with the group but thanks to the Uni again, our timetable cannot match so we're hard to get a time to discuss our assignment.
Tutorial one even worst, the tutor just roughly discuss the tutorial answer and that's it. We asked for the hardcopy answer for our tutorial so that we are able to do revision and her answer to us is " It's forbidden to give student the answer sheets for tutorial"!... Really what the f... is that, NO wonder the lecturer said less than 50% of previous sem students pass the exam. Of cause a million thank you to having such an "excellent" tutor who know scolding students for lacking of confidence at the early morning 8am class but don't even care whether her student's understanding on the class!!!

UTAR--> Gonna be a nightmare soon. Everythings is totally out of standard and controls. From management to tutor... sigh... I'm thinking to give up studying here... really... I am very very tired and pressure... Gonna be mad soon if continue like this..

You're still the best guy I ever meet....

2009-06-20T22:50:00.003+08:00

Skipped one day for not updating my blog...

Yesterday my Management Principle's lecture was so boring, but I didn't fall asleep. I just wonder why my lecturer so cute that she explain every single words on the slide, our english isn't so bad to understand the meaning of those words le... I saw my friends was sleep during the class and I felt like laughing but too bad cannot=X... We had our assignment discussion and everything was smooth-going.

Night time, I went out meeting a friend that I get to know at IvaliceRO. This was my first time seeing him in real life. Well, he is quite a nice person to chat with, and he is so funny. I can feel that he was so shy when seeing me at first but he manage to control it nicely... haha... He's quite a gentlemen to me but weakness--> shy and don't have self-confidence. Went back and RO till 2am. When I was sleeping, I was having nightmare sia, when I wake up I felt so tired and shock. Luckily he still haven't sleep so he sms to accompany me. Or else I don't know what should I do...

I saw that idiot msn said that his phone spoiled and ask all of us leave our contact there, I was thinking that do he remember my phone number even his phone spoil? Well, I think I don't have to leave my contact there since he never even call me once since I reach Kampar at 24th of May until now, so save my energy. That girl said she will coming back then he was so excited and even ask the time she will reach. It's not fair at all. Ya, I know I lose completely. That's why I don't wait for your calls anymore.

I miss Maryn so much. I know it's nearly two years back but still he is the best person(guy) that I met and the best bf I had... I know it's all because of the co-incident and my stubbornness... However, the words is still on my mind... " there's not such things as co-incidents, all things happen is because of fate". Sigh, when will I have my next relationship? I hope this time please get me a similar and slightly better one... I pray and pleased...

It's complicated..

2009-06-19T00:11:00.003+08:00

Few days didn't update my blog, I was quite tired at the previous days.
Everythings is fine for me. However, not as fine as everyone I guess. 2 assignments have been given, and mid-term test is coming soon. Hopefully everythings will be fine. I appreciate them which is my team members effort for concentrate on what's my idea and giving a great co-operation with me. I believe that the Principle Management Assignment is gonna be great going.
I just worried about the law one but thanks to that kind guy, for "sacrificing" himself to join me as I'm a new one on his class. He's nice and funny too^_^...

My housemates was quite nice to me and they care about me, think that I m lucky to have them all here but things is my neighbour. I wondering did they know how to park their car or not! Everytime want to test my driving skill one, really damn it...zzzz...

My sickness still havent recover, especially my flu and sore throat... sigh...

I think my feeling started to fade... towards him. Cause from I came to Kampar until now, zero-calls and zero-msgs from him. Previously, I keep waiting and waiting but in the end non of them I receive. I start to feel dissappointment towards him. These few days, I realize that I start to forget how to await his action. I don't wait it anymore, I feel like maybe soon he will be a past tense to me. Even though one bond still exist, but I might consider to take it out when I found my mr.right... I thought he might use that opportunity to keep in touch with me but no...he didn't. So I think perhaps I was hoping for too much.

He is dumb enough if until today he still unable to read and feel my existance and my goal. Sigh... But if want me to tell him directly, it's not necessary anymore. Because before telling, I know this gonna be a lose-war. So what's the point for risking our relationship, just let it fade will do.

I saw some photos that really hurt. But I know sometime is good to know the truth, at least I'm free now for getting a new target or to get into another love journey. I had enough with it really... Everytime when I was really sad or angry, the only things that make me smile plus calm down is tomato. I eat or drink the juice make me feel better. Thanks for that really... I <3>

Sick like a half dead fish...

2009-06-15T23:23:00.002+08:00

Yesterday because I was not feeling well so I didn't update my blog...>.<''

Well, actually I found out myself not in good condition since yesterday morning but still I insist to go Gurney and eat my favourite sushi, but sadly I dun have the appetite to eat when I reached there. Ms.Je and me catch-up a movie after our lunch, is the BLOOD the last vampire... It's actually from an animation aka anime called Blood+, however, still the anime more interesting than the movie... Movie's impression--> keep take the samurai sword and chop chop chop!!! lol...

Was seriously sick after I got back to home, fever and flu start and I just lying down on the bed like half dead fishie...Sigh... Because of this I was unable to see them at night time, but he don't even care whether I seeing him onot, dun even know I'm sick and din even care about me. Dam him...zzzz

Today I feel better but still abit dizzy, it's good that I'm able to drive 2 hours+ to back to Kampar. Phew...thx god. I brought some prawn and fish back this time because my housemates want to have them, I granted their wishes.. hope they happy with it... We cooked prawnie and brocoli as our dinner dishes, taste good of cause^_^...

Hopefully I can recover as soon as possible...

2 days at home...

2009-06-14T01:36:00.002+08:00

I was so lazy to update my blog yesterday...XD

I had gone to quite alot places to eat my "wanted" lists... but sad things is Joyce and them FFK me again for the dinner. Due to that idiot... sigh... Guess I have come back soon, and I think this time coming back I won't have chance to see him... Glad or sad just no longer a matter.

I went to Queensbay today and I saw William and Danny first, I was so happy to see them. And after that met Louis and my ex-supervisor, she still looks so happy when seeing me. I wonder that's fake or real smile is that, however thank for caring me~=)
I ate Kim Gary and I was very full because I eat alot.

Night time met Louis and his Gf at Mcd with Ms.Je, chatting there and it was fun. 2mr will be the last day I staying at Penang for this trip. Hope to see him and them but I guess him is quite impossible. =/

And I want to eat sushi tomorrow...T__T

Went back to Penang today~

2009-06-12T02:20:00.003+08:00

Woohoo, finally I'm at Penang now... Feel like leaving Penang for years! I miss Penang very much, especially the food here...

Was having my lunch at home with my mum's cooking... Quite some time I never eat her cookings. Well, I was departed at 11pm but 2 pm only reach Penang, because along the highway was traffic jams. Thanks my housemate for helping me pumping the air pressure for my car's tyres yesterday...

Was having dinner with Ms. Je and that dinner was great. I miss the drinks and food. We went to Bed cafe after fetched her mum and I was asked someone to come but at last he gave me another dissappointment. I try my best to avoid him from myself, I guess that's the best way for now...

Through out google, I find the things that I wanted to find since last 2 weeks... I get to know many things through that blog. However, my heart was bleeding again... Wonder when will the wound will be heal... sigh...

两个cases...

2009-06-09T23:45:00.003+08:00

第一个case..

眼看一个曾经自己喜欢、又被他耍玩了遗弃的的人在努力着追求自己的朋友
心里有点无奈...
要帮他也不是；要害他又不是...
可他不是一个好男生，是个见一个爱一个的家伙

我想要不是因为外婆的托梦，
我会是被耍得更惨的那个。
我不是迷信的人，可是我相信巧合。
如果只是梦境一场，我不理也没什么；
可一切巧合让我心里不安。

这几个月终于见识到外婆在梦里说的话了。
是幸运还是不幸？

可是如果你真的爱过我，请你换我原本的平静...

第二个case..

不懂何时的我变得那么会吃醋，
我知道我们只是朋友，而朋友也不必常常联络的；
可我就是很希望接到你的电话，
我好想和你分享每天的点点滴滴。
可是我得到的一大堆的失望，
曾答应自己不可以在主动找你；
可是最后我办不到...

我知道我比不上那两女生，
无论花多少钱你又愿意寻找他们；
但是你却不愿意花五分钟在我身上。
我不懂你是真白痴还是假惺惺，
但是你给与我的是压力和悲伤。
真的好痛好痛...

你关心我吗？不
你珍惜我吗？不觉得

我要学会不再理你的一切
我也要学会不再忍让你了
之间的忍让和耐性已经不再值得花在你身上
换回来的是一大堆的委屈和无奈啊！

我喜欢这句话：“If I were to care everyone's feelings, who will care about mine in the end?”

Worst Weekend ever I guess

2009-06-07T23:48:00.002+08:00

Skipped two days for not updating my blog. Was too tired to update it...

Friday I went to my second lecture class for Management Principle and the tutorial class too. I get to know few friends there. Few of them are from Penang too but I feel they are abit hard to communicate, although I am from Penang too. However, as long as when I get back to my hostel and see my housemates, I feel relax...

We actually plan to go to Ipoh at Saturday and we did make it to Ipoh and have our meal at Mc. D but suddenly one of my housemate receive a shocking call which was to inform here that her uncle was passed away. She was unable to accept the truth and she cried. I feel sad too because when she cry I don't know what to do... Ask her don't cry? I don't think that's right, ask her continue to cry?? abit weird... Sigh, she was rushing back to her hometown. Of cause, we follow her back to Kampar and I fetch her to buy the bus ticket. Hope she's alright now...
Yesterday's dinner was mushroom soup and egg's salad... I cooked them and my housemates enjoy them very much, I am happy to see the way they finish off my cooking. =)

I am happy get to know them because we all have many similarities... Like we all love to eat Mc. D, we like to eat salad and prawns. It's rare that I can find that among my friends.

Today was probably the worst sunday for me. I wake up late, so do my housemates, left 3 of us... because 2 of them going back to hometown. We was so hungry and was planning on order some food delivery but sadly, today is sunday, all close=.=''' Last decision was--> Maggi mee...my god... I hate it. Whole afternoon I done alots of things and I'm so tired... Like washing my clothes, wash car, wash the kitchen and so on...
I want to take a nap but my housemate kacau me and not allowed me to sleep..='(... Dinner time was quite faint too. As we order the burger at 730pm, but the burger reach our hostel at 830pm, we hungry until want to eat off all the chocolate at the refrigerator... sigh...

Luckily tomorrows no class. So I can slack now... XD...

1st day to attend lecture class...

2009-06-04T23:02:00.003+08:00

Was woke up early in the morning to prepare becaus today it's going to be my first day attending lecture class on Corporate and Business Law. I was not surprise that my lecturer is an indian. I doubt is that all law teachers are indian... But his teaching is quite nice and interesting. I get to know one new friend at the lecture class, however, she's not going to be in the same class with me anymore... Sigh, guess I have to be brave enough to get some new friends there in order to group-up for assignment.

Get back from Uni and I started to clean my room, and finally just rest in front of my computer. Print out the lecture notes and so on, oh god... It's a lots of them and my printer ink is limited, I wonder can it survive until the end of the semester. I was awaiting for my housemates to come back hostel because I am so boring without them.

Dinner time, today 3 of us prepared 2 dishes only because we were too hungry to prepare more. Just plain steamed prawns and cooked vegetable, but they taste great. Maybe 5 of us are too hungry, but 2 of them was so funny when I went to fetch them back. They make me laugh until tired lol... We enjoy the meal and the desserts, mango~~~

I quite enjoy today or I might say everyday when they are around. Because they are all cute and funny people. lol... Hope with this I might be able to forget those hurts and pains... from him.

I hate the weather here....

2009-06-03T22:25:00.002+08:00

Like I said, the weather here is hell hot like desert. zzzz... Last time when I was at Penang, I felt that my car air-conditioner was so cold and everytime I only turn it on at the lowest volume. But here, I feel my air conditioner on the car is useless even I turn it to the max volume! ahhhh, it's hot !!!!

However, I enjoy my days with my housemates. They all are so cute and nice people. Today we took our clothes to laundry. The aunty there was friendly but when I get back my cloth, they are in bad condition..T_T... My favourite dress was "furing"... sigh... At evening time we went to Pasar Malam aka Night market here which is located near our housing area. It was a huge one, plenty of food and things there. But also alot of people crowded there~_~. We bought quite alot things there but the same problem occured, hot!!!!!

I get to know some new housemates today, but I feel those who I know before was better than the new one. Even the new ones are from Penang, but their attitude is so arrogant and I smell their selfishness. Maybe I'm thinking too much lol...

When I hang out with my housemates, I'm happy. However, when I am alone. I feel sad, because I still unable to accept the fact that he act like ignored me... He can waste alot to call a girl at oversea but not a free one... Maybe I was a tool for him last time, now he don't need me anymore so just abandon me like that perhaps... I hope my hope and feeling towards him will be fade as the time pass... really....

Tired but full of jokes...

2009-06-02T00:33:00.002+08:00

Was wake up early for the banking and PTPTN stuffs. God, the weather here is hot like hell. With tons of things to settle off, I really very tired. Went to the University and check my things, found out somethings wrong there! I should be in Year 2 but what the hell why my class is Year 1! zzz

My lunch was just half cup of porridge and dinner was mushroom soup with dumpling. I am happy that my housemates help me to finish up all my dumpling that I brought from Penang. Well, I feel very happy when chatting or hang out with them, they are all so funny.

Especially the cute girl, cute face with cute action make us laugh non-stop. Of cause I appreciate them for caring me. Like yesterday when I just arrived, they welcomed me back by waiting me at the gate and help me carry my luggages. I was so touch when I saw these. I enjoy my time staying with them.

Hopefully by that I would be able to forget what's my pain and forget all those nonsense. I don't want to remember anything related to him anymore. I shall get my new life here I think. But talk is easy but action is hard. I still on my way, wait me for please...=)

Back to Kampar, but mind was still stuck at Penang...

2009-05-31T23:08:00.002+08:00

All the way drive back to Kampar took around 2 hours. Well, I feel not very tired after the drive. However, my cute housemates and I went to Tesco there to have our lunch there. I know 2 more new housemate and friend. I guess I missed alot of funny incident during the 5 days that I went back to Penang. That's why I always said, I regret to go back Penang. I missed the exciting part between them, I lose my trust towards him and I missed alot other things. I went back was just because I want to see him, but what I get is tons of dissappointment.

I feel happy when I'm hanging around with my housemates, they all are sot-plugged type aka crazy type of people. They create alot of jokes that made me laugh non-stop until tears drop. Lol...

Dinner time, today my dinner was the most healthier dinner I ever had in my entire life I think, but maybe I need to eat them in this 3 years time. Those are steamed vegetables and some homemade fishcakes. I guess I may have a healthy life over here, with this whole bunch of funny people.

Eyes was dropping, good luck all...

Going back tomorrow...

2009-05-31T00:23:00.002+08:00

Hmm, nothings much today. Just went to shopping with Ms.Je at Queensbay Mall. Was buying alot of things like formal shirt and so on. I went back to our DSS shop and saw 3 newbies there. I wonder why my cute ex-boss like to hire somebody like them, no wonder our sales were hard to increase, I think most probably is because those guys are not good-looking enough, not even "able-looking". Well, was happy to see Louis there, at least he wasn't like that idiot...

Actually was planning to go yam cha with them but the stupid Joyce FFK us at last minute. Sigh, I guess after month or weeks only we can meet again. Gonna miss you guys.

I am waiting his calls or msgs, I am stupid right? But I know he won't call... Even is free... Damn it. I hope 1 day will have a great person bring a baseball stick and smack me till I faint and wake up without any memories. I hope it very much sometime. At least I no need to think much...

Class start this thursday, I was awaiting this moment. Hope I can have new friends that maybe could help me to forget things about him. But no matter how, I won't able to forget completely, because there is still a bond between both of us. Unless one day he decide to cut it off, then different case. But of cause I don't hope it...

My nightmare...

2009-05-30T00:31:00.004+08:00

I dream back similar incident that happen last 2 days. I was so upset when I wake up, if the dream was real, I really no idea how I gonna accept it as a truth and face it straight. Luckily it was just dreams, please don't be reality... for now at least...

Kinda moodless today, I even don't have the mood to eat too. I know I won't let it go so easily unless he gave me a calls or what so ever, but it seem like this is somethings call mission impossible. Partly, I was worried what to bring at the coming sunday. My housemates told me the timetable have been released. Well, I quite satisfied with the days, my classes are at wednesday and thurday. Mean if I'm too free or miss penang, I can go back at friday and come back at tuesday. What I dislike is the time=.=''' one of the class start at 8am... so earlyT___T, I can't get to sleep more on that day I guess...

I went dinner with Ms.Je at 9pm. We was wondering around Gurney there because of no parking spaces were available. We finally decide to go FACES. I didn't go there before, but the food is quite nice. Only bad thing is the mouse was running around the floor and make me feel bit of disgusting feeling. My mood was slightly recover due to the tomato juice, you know, I like tomato juice, the sweet saltyness... And second was the ice cream. When I not in good mood, this two things play great parts to recover my mood. But this time, not so easy too. Slightly but not holy.

I trying not to find him, sms him or call him. I wonder how long I can bear it... It happenned lots of times before but I think this time I would be more determine with my aim due to the "mark". Bugs grow, even one of them die, there are still lots of them behind...

You're the same...

2009-05-29T00:53:00.003+08:00

I trying hard in order to forget things about you but I failed many times. The reason I changed this blog address because I don't want you to see it, I don't want you to know me more now. I rather you don't know anythings and tease or pissed me off so that I'll be able to hate you and stop that stupid feeling towards you.

I really hate when you don't know how to consider my feeling. Of cause, this is somethings you won't change, because to you, only that 2 girls is everything, not me... I hate you mentioned some girl's name who are not familiar with me and telling me how well you get along with them. Because for no reason, I feel very unhappy with it. I hate you keep murmuring me, is like everythings I must listen to yours! Sigh...

Maybe this time I decide to come back from Kampar was wrong at the first place. If I didn't come back, I won't get to know somethings like that which hurt my heart deeply. It's not because I listen from other but look from your face expression. I think I caught your real purpose for asking me going so far just in order to eat dinner with you. It's not really that you want to eat dinner with us, but to see his gf and tell her things about that girl. Am I right?

Today I'm not writing the things happenned today. Because I still very unhappy with yesterday's incident. I can't just put it at the back of my brain and forget about it. Because it was so hurt and pain ever to know it... This time I skip the orientation and come back, is not mainly because of the stupid movie nor food. I just want to see you and other friends. Cause I know I won't be able to come back so fast, at least after June. I pleased to meet all and especially you. I know I would miss you all like mad when living in Kampar. But what I get from you was ... Sigh...

If you don't like to go out with me, why you promise me at first place? if you don't like to go movie, why you ask me to go so far and follow my car back? then please, I hate to listen all of your complaints. I always be patient and behave well so that I won't scold you with your stupid attitude, but if one day I really unable to bear it anymore, I'll definately cut off your tongue and scold you without holding it anymore.

Don't challenge my temper later, you'll regret. I'm not great saint, I just a petty little snake, I'll bite you without mercy if you get on my nerves. You would be safe now because I like you, but if one day I don't, you'll gone... not with easy way too

Worthless and wasted day...

2009-05-28T02:21:00.002+08:00

Wake up late today, actually was in average mood because I was going to BM Jusco to eat dinner with them. But before going to there, I was going to the bus station to buy tomorrow's bus ticket for my brother. I was so rush because I scared of the traffic jams might occur at the Penang brigde. However, it seem the traffic was smooth. Only a little bit of traffic jam at the beginning part.

I departed at 6pm and reach there around 7pm. Was wondering around there with William's gf. Had dinner at the so called Sushi Queen. I don't really like the food there. And I was very unhappy get to know somethings that really hurt me along the highway with William'gf.
We caught a movie around 11pm named Angel Demon which is the movie I watched before. And I have to pretend that I didn't see it before.

Today is totally suck, I really really + extremely unhappy with it. I admit I don't even control my emotion and temper well today. I hate everythings today and I regret to go to BM there. Food, people, environment and even the words. I regret to go so far just in order to have dinner with them.

Yea, perhaps I shouldn't come back to Penang at the first place. I must practise to strengthen my aim and goal. I can't be so soft-hearted anymore. Because of him, I had lost many things that should belong to me. Times, energies, and even friends.

And please take note I'm gonna change my blog address soon. Sorry for the trouble.

Nice day~~~<3 Penang

2009-05-27T02:35:00.002+08:00

Was so happy that today I was able to come back Penang. Departed 11am and reach around 1pm. There was raining heavily along the highways, it was so challenging drive at such condition. Of cause, I have to stay alert all the time to ensure everything is at perfect condition.

Was gone to dinner with Ms.Je at Sakae Sushi Restaurant, I purposely went there because I know that Kampar don't have such restaurant. Well, I eat alot~~~ soft shell crabby, mushroomie~~ etc... Yummy... Before I back to Kampar, I want to eat again!! After that, I went to Gasoline with 2 person. Chatting there was fun with them. Especially with a joker and siao po...

Around 1030pm, second round with William, his gf and Mr.K at Mc Donalds. And then went to their hostel to meet Mr. S and Mr. N... Pity for them because their housemate was sleeping tightly and unable to hear their door's call. Staying there chatting with them and back around 1am.

I feel very happy to see all of them, although I went Kampar for only 2 days, I miss them alot. Looking forward on 2mr's activities~~~ movie gogogo~!!

New environment, new friends, new life but old problems

2009-05-25T23:48:00.002+08:00

I woke up very early today, quite surprise that I was able to wake up in time. Went to University at 745am and do the registration stuff. Omgosh, walking from Block A to Block C really tiring. My god... Get to know my ex-classmate's housemate which is suppose to be my housemate if I didn't switch place. Well, they quite friendly but I feel weird for the guy's. Lol...

Noon time, I went to Tesco again with my housemate, our new housemate join us too. Two of them was very friendly, and I suppose they are not as open minded as we do. They are from east M'sia. Was so boring at afternoon sia. Zero entertainment here, weather was so hot until I was too lazy to get out from the fan's area.

Actually I was planning to cook mushroom soup for my dinner. But I never expect that my housemate's mother will cook for me. Thanks oh~. Was chatting with them until 11pm+...
2mr I'm gonna go back to Penang. Can't wait to see them...or him...lol

Even though I'm at Kampar, I still don't know why I miss him so much... The more I miss, the more I hurt. Because I would never understand what's his thinking. Know and understand is different case you know? Sigh, Or I guess I have to give chance for getting a new one over here. I quite confident that soon there will be one... Just wondering which one will voice-out first... =)

My first day staying at westlake,Kampar

2009-05-24T23:00:00.002+08:00

My lovely daddy, mum and brother accompany went to Kampar, which is the place I currently staying. We depart around 9am but reach here already near 12am. Reason for being slow is because the driver wasn't me, it was my brother. And secondly, my mum was behind here yelling at us if we drive over 100km/h..=.=''

We went to the only shopping complex that available there, Tesco~. Well, I was surprise because I found that almost everythings was selling there. But the same problems still, NO MCD! sigh...
I reached my room and feel hot@@ Weather here is NO. 1 hot!!!! Because here is near to Lumut, the hottest and driest place in Malaysia. I guess I have to bear the "warm" here=.=''

My mum and dad helped me to clean over my dusty room. And we went to old town there for lunch. The food here is cheaper compare to Penang. Nice to know that. My parents and brother back with coach which is departed at 3pm. I try to move around there place and way there. And I lost my way!!! Luckily I still able to get back to the road that heading to my hostel. I was lucky enough that when I get back to home, I get to know my new housemate. She was a friendly person. I feel not comfortable actually because when I feel like drinking water, my water bottles bullied me. =(. People use 2 hands to open the bottle but I used 2 hands plus 2 legs sia. Stupid bottle.

I was going to find my ex-classmate's house there at night. Luckily my housemate willing to accompany me. And this time I didn't lost my way le!!! hehehe... We had dinner at the new town there, the food was sucks. I never taste the noodles like that. I was hungry but it made me lose my appetite. However, the chinese cupcakes and deep fried prawnie i bought later was nice. =)

I miss Penang. I miss him too... sigh...

Unreachable one...

2009-05-23T01:21:00.002+08:00

You are like a sun,

I am like a plant.

You give me sunshine and warmness,

I need you loves and cares.

I doing my best to get your attention,

I trying hard to reach you

But I hurt everytime I tried.

Once I noticed a bug appear,

I try my best to get ride off it.

I was so happy that I'm able to destroy it

However,

I realize that was a tiny bug from the thousand's

And it isn't easy trying to erase anyone of them.

That's why no matter how hard I try to erase the bugs,

there's always be another one appearing continuously.

I know almost everythings about you,

And I'm trying to know even more than the current one.

However,

Even though I know things about you,

I wasn't able to understand you.

Your thinking, your behaviours or your feeling too.

You walked so slow,

and I was trying to catch-up.

No matter how fast and how hard I try to run to you,

I'm not able to reach your side.

When I able to reach you,

You was just standing in front of me,

so close to me.

But I know your heart might be at elsewhere.

Even you are beside me,

you are so close to me,

yet I feel I was far away from you.

Not the distance but the heart and mind...

I was so close.... So close.... But I wasn't able to grab you because your heart is far away from me...

Am I A boring person to You?

2009-05-22T02:56:00.002+08:00

Was going out with Ms.Je and met another 2 primary school's friends. Surprise that the one that I never met her for the previous 8 years was appear in front of me. Well, she doesn't change much, the way she speak still as funny as ever. Looking back on myself in previous, I noticed I do changed alot, from a quiet person into a noisy girl.

We had our lunch or should said combination of breakfast, lunch and tea at Seoul Garden. I always satisfied with the food there, so do the other. Before that, I took my car to a foundry in order to repair the spoiled parts. Luckily it costed RM190 only but without the paint. With the paint mean have to add-on RM100 for it. Whole afternoon was hugging the food there lol~... Delicious~~~

Back home at 7pm and rest a while and prepare for another outing. This time was going to Penang Bowl to grant my incompleted wish, Bowling! Well, 6 of us going but only 5 of us playing. Louis, his gf, his unknown friend, Mr.K and me were the playing one. And Joyce was there to rot. Quite happy because I finally can bowling with them, although I m not the winning one. And eat supper with them.

Today I felt that his attitude is back, just like previous. Mean, don't even considering other feeling when talking. Sick about it but no choice, guess that is somethings unable to change. Because I'm not the special one to him I guess. But it's weird sometime with his behavious...sigh.. Whatever, just hope that everythings fine for me when going to Kampar.

Stupid Brown Skinner Ruinned my mood!

2009-05-21T01:39:00.002+08:00

I travel to Kampar again today. Was quite nervous because on the car I drive, only me know the way to Kampar and the town area's way. Start going at 11am and reach there about 1pm. I decide to take my keys from the Danish Office first, but due to their "efficiency", I wait about 1 hour only can get into the counter and get my keys.

I stepped in my room for the first time. Well, to me is quite nice but I don't understand my mum keep murmuring this and that and it makes me headache. On the way go to Shell Petrol station at the old town there. While I was waiting the traffic lights to turn green, a stupid brownie drove the stupid car and bang my car. It really ruinned my mood at first!! Because I m rushing to go back to Penang but I have to see their banana faces! If he apologize sincerely, I might be go soft but they didn't! Somemore ask me to discount from RM320 to RM300. If want discount, find a police and talk to me, I don't mind wasted another RM300 in order to see your beloved banana son kiss goodbye with his license!

I reach Penang around 7pm and we went to have our dinner at Yatai Mura located at Queensbay, I love the food and the food recovered my mood. But I quite rush because later I still have to fetch my brother. Thanks to Mr. K for willing to accompany me for this. And we went to find our ex-colleague after "throwing" my brother back home.

However, I feel happy because when I reach there and back to Penang, I received his calls. I don't know whether he was truly care or just free to call. I'm happy with it... At least he called. And other too =)... What he done and said today was like a miracle, because it cure my mood 100% lol... Although he did mention her again, which is what I unable to compete with... but thank you=)...

I Just Wanna be myself...

2009-05-20T00:31:00.002+08:00

Today was totally disappointed. Because I wanna play bowling but Penang Bowl there was full. One-stop's one was under renovation. Sigh... However, I quite happy with today's. Hanging out with Joyce, Mr.K, Louis and his gf and an unknown funny guy was fun. Especially when we were at GasOline which is located at the new Times Square there.

However, today he did mention somethings I dislike. And I felt that, I was being glad too early. I shouldn't think that I was on the victory section when I just won and defeated one. Well, another one is auto-disqualify~. Today, I realize that I shouldn't be like the way now. Because no matter how hard I try to avoid those unneccessary person appearing around us, it will only resulted as a winner for a short period of time. As one gone, and new one will appear again. Or worst one is the old one still exist and became sources to get on my nerves. It's a endless fight. Why?? Simple, because I'm not attractive enough for him. I am not pretty or clever too. So it already show that I'm not his cup of tea for sure I think.

Every problems I had or having, I definately got the confidences to settle them but not this 1. It bugged me few months already. If I'm not his cup of tea, then why he acting like I still got hope? Sigh, I really don't know. I don't even know what I had wrote about today in this blog. Everythings was so messy and idle. Or maybe I should just appreciate that I was able get to know him in my entire life? But I just don't want it to be like this!!!! I was so close, yet feel like so far away from him!

For now, what I can do is... Learn how to accept the truth and learn how to forget plus give up... Which were the lessons I failed to learn since the day I get to know him...and them....

没有公平的世界、只有残酷的一切

2009-05-19T01:20:00.003+08:00

“人固有一死，或重于泰山，或轻于鸿毛”；
死就死了，还要考虑得像座山还是像一条毛吗？
当然我不是鼓励人去自杀啦！
一个人站出来说为了国家而愿意牺牲自己，
如果他死了，是有几百万个人称赞他是英雄；
可是他家人呢？
若他是一对老夫妇唯一的依靠？
若他是几个小孩和妻子的依靠？
对！他为国人死了，一了百了呢！
称上了“重于泰山”
可他身边的人就被那泰山的石头压到偏偏了。

是问有几个人能公平的为事业和家庭付出？
大多数人，都会是专注事业而忽略了家庭，或相反。
世界是公平的？
如果你认为是的话，
为什么我姓“张”可是你不姓“张”？
为什么我20岁可你却是10岁？
太多太多的疑问了。

“公平”这两个字的存在，
不是因为它背着原有的意识；
而是为了安慰人们心中的恐惧和无奈，
也为了掩饰这世界所拥有的残酷。
你以为那个人们每次画的心形真的是代表我们的心吗?
请试试看想象把人的心来对折看，
两边一样扩吗？血管的数量两边都一样吗？
那你画出的心形也是再次掩饰着世界的黑点。

很喜欢看见“我♥你”？
拜托！在掩饰着你的谎言吗？
若是真的爱对方，行动就是最好的证明了，
何必浪费纸张大费周章地写那么多无谓的谎言和虚伪的承诺？

I am too kind? lol...

2009-05-18T01:34:00.003+08:00

Woke early in order to fetch my friend back to her Hair Salon for work. Was quite a healthy day to me. Having my favourite lunch with the Sushido game from Viwawa and Restaurant city game from Facebook.

Actually didn't plan to go out at afternoon time but seem my ex-colleague called me asked whether I will be at Queensbay or not, so I just tell him I will be there if they wish to see me of cause. I went there with Joyce. When I saw them, only few of them talked with me. Of cause I saw Mr.K there too. Having fun and chat with them and accompany William to have his "lunch-tea" at The Chicken Rice Shop. Actually I do plan to accompany Mr.K to dinner too at 730pm but it seem that Joyce can't make it. So we leave at 630pm. I feel sorry for that since I read his emotion and feel bad about it. When someone coming and talk with me, he just turn away but doing nothing, I seriously doubted what's going on... I can guess by reading his face-emotion. However, I don't know whether I should happy with it or feel sorry with it... @_@

I went to Ms.Je house as usual and bought McD via drive-through at the one near Farlim. It's my first time buying set meal via drive-through at there, I feel it quite convenience... Good job for that=)... I leave her house after I get to know Joyce and William asked me to "yam cha". Ok I back to Queensbay again and I saw Mr.K was cleaning the road show things there. Fine since he refuse to have supper with us. I understand his problems so I'm okie with it.

3 of us going to OXO cafe, it's my first time going there too. Quite nice actually, both drinks and the pizza. I like it. Back and reached home at 1am. Well, that's all my day.

Sometime, other friends told me that I am too kind to them. Because to him, the other join me going out is because I have the benefit or advantages to them. Like having car moving around. Seriously, I doubt the facts that he gave. I'm too kind?? or I am kind? Surprise to heard that someone said I'm kind. Touching sia...=')...LOL... But to me, it's ok with them to join me because I had or have the advantages to them. Only them can get used of my advantages of cause, other than them who always be with me, JUST F... OFF. I doesn't care if it is them because I trust them=)... And even they make used of me, as long as I feel happy and satisfied or getting what I want. It's ok~

I always praying that all my sincere friends will be in good condition at everytime and everywhere...

Lovely Day~

2009-05-17T02:11:00.002+08:00

I went Hair Salon with my mum. And again my mum ask me to cut my hair and redye the color of my hair... Since the boss offer me at an affordable rate, so I cut my hair and dye it too. Hmm, I like the new color =)...We went around 4pm but back at 7pm, took quite a long time to settle my hair.

Today Wyne and Sharon were coming over Penang, I thought I will be with them till late night. But who knows Joyce messages me and ask to hang out. I just say a yes then change my original plan. 8pm I went to have dinner with Sharon and Wyne at Kim Gary's Restaurant at Queensbay till 1030pm, waiting to fetch Mr.K too. But who know Mr.K was late and I have to fetch Wyne back my home before going to meet Joyce and others. Thus, Mr.K figure out a "story" to lie them. Actually I feel bad that we were lying at them, but no choice..=X... But the lies only know by both of us only. Joyce was excluded too.

We reach Coffee Island about 1130pm and already see Dickson and his Gf waiting there. They yelled that they had been there for an hour. Feel sorry to them@_@.. Jason giving us a big aeroplane again today. We changed to Bed Cafe due to the "overloaded" people at Coffee Island.
Having fun with playing card and chatting. Well, I quite satisfied for today's. At least he still remember things that I told him before, and when he murmuring me, I find it quite funny actually. Lol...

For now, no matter how he felt or feel on me, I doesn't care much. I just hope that he treat me as a good friend and that all. Ya, I feel that you treat me better than the other... But I know I might lose to another group of people, like my old friend who you know her etc... I'm okie with it since you know them earlier before knowing me. Just hoping everythings will fade by the washing of time but please don't erase my memories...

Yesterday plus today~

2009-05-15T23:36:00.002+08:00

Due to yesterday I'm too tired and I was unable to update my blog... sry ya =X

Yesterday I wake quite early because I promise to hang out with Ms.Je to Queensbay... Well, she and her friends went there to buy present actually. However, we have a look over the Swatch Shop. I saw the watch that I love before, it's still there but the price seem the same~_~ was still so expensive, RM2XX... I can't buy it now because I predict that I have to spend over 3k this 3 weeks. Fees for study+deposit+rental+daily expenses...it's killing me already. Sigh, have to give up to buy the watch I guess...

We went to BJ complex there to bowling~ It's been long time since the last time I played it. I have fun there with them^_^...

Today was totally blank. Well, I fall down and hurt my leg... Now I unable to walk properly, my left leg was so pain once I trying to stand but I guess I can't make it more than 1 minute... Pain painT___T... I hope it can recover before monday! I want to go bowling again...='(...
Before fall down, I was planning to ask him to accompany me go to Queensbay tomorrow but when I asked him, he gave me bunch of ice and needle... Sigh... Now just nice that I fall down, no need to go anywhere! zzzz... Hopeless now, I was wanted to ask them hang out before I go to Kampar, but everytime he is the one that ruin my mood.

haiz.....

Rest In Peace to my ex-neighbour aunty

2009-05-14T01:31:00.003+08:00

1st of all, I send my condolences to my ex-neighbour friend, Miss Tan's mother. After long fight with the cancer, finally can rest... Aunty, hope you rest in peace at heaven there. I'll help her whenever she's in trouble or need helps.
_______________________________________________________________________

13th May 2009

Afternoon, Sushido-ing as always~ Because of too bored, I find back my "Kyou Kara Maou aka God Save Our King"'s DVD to watch for fun. This is the first anime I ever watch in my life. This is also the anime that make me addicted and entering the world of Mangas and Animes. I was shock when I get to know that my ex-primary friend's mum aka my ex-neighbour had passed away due to breast cancer.

7pm, both me and Ms. Je went to Gurney again. To eat what I was hoping to have within this few weeks- Breek. I want to use finish all the voucher of cause. The food there is average taste only to me. But for the sake of the voucher, ok lo... gogogo... I ordered a Pasta with mushroom sauce and a drink named Ocean. Hmm, I like the color of the drink, it's blue and white colors. Finished the dinner and we head to the funeral after fetch Ms. Je's mum.

Why the fate is so cruel? God took her father last few years ago, follow by her grandfather. And now before her 21th birthday, she has to bear the pain of losing her mother. It isn't fair! Why those who did the murder + all those criminal can live longer than those who are kind and gentle? Aren't those bad guys suppose to die? Not fair!

I really don't know how to greet her. Take it easy? c'mon, how to be easy if both parents left you... Don't be sad? how to be not sad for this situation...>.<... really don't know what to say to her. Hope she be strong...

You will be always in my heart...

2009-05-13T00:19:00.002+08:00

Nothing much today, just went out on dinner and have my favourite XXL Crispy Chicken ~...

Everytime when I am in sad mode or anger mode, things about you 100% can calm me down. Your pics, action etc~ I always remember those words you said. I know everytime you like to joke and perli me so that I can remember not to do the same mistakes again. And when I was not happy or sick, you care bout me. If someone tease me off or pissed me off, you sure the one who stand up and scold them back and helped me to calm down(although your ways are funny and weird). You know me the best, even though both of us get to know each other not really in long period of time.

I love you, secretly. I don't know whether you do or don't. But I know both of us won't be together... at least for now -->won't. However, no matter where you are or where I am, I miss you for sure. Will you miss me too? Hmm, doesn't matter. As long as you are happy and doing great, I will be happy for you too. You changed alot from the first time I saw you. I like the changes though. I guess among our group, I'm the one who know things bout you most. Glad that you trust me. =)... 1 week left... I think I'll miss you like mad when I am not around.

This song is for you...

~I'd Lie~ by Taylor Swift

I don't think that passenger seat
Has ever looked this good to me
He tells me about his night
And I count the colors in his eyes

He'll never fall in love he swears
As he runs his fingers through his hair
I'm laughing 'cause I hope he's wrong
And I don't think it ever crossed his mind
He tells a joke I fake a smile
That I know all his favorite songs and

I could tell you his favorite colors green
He loves to argue, born on the seventeenth
His sister's beautiful, he has his father's eyes
And if you ask me if I love him, I'd lie

He looks around the room
Innocently overlooks the truth
Shouldn't a light go on?
Doesn't he know I've had him memorized for so long?

He sees everything black and white
Never let nobody see him cry
I don't let nobody see me wishing he was mine

I could tell you his favorite colors green
He loves to argue, born on the seventeenth
His sister's beautiful, he has his father's eyes
And if you ask me if I love him, I'd lie

He stands there then walks away
My God, if I could only say
I'm holding every breathe for you

He'd never tell you but he can play guitar
I think he can see through everything but my heart
First thought when I wake up is, "My god, he's beautiful"
So I put on my make up and pray for a miracle

Yes, I could tell you his favorite colors green
He loves to argue oh and it kills me
His sisters beautiful he has his father's eyes
And if you asked me if I love him
If you ask me if I love him, I'd lie

Count Down... 8 days left...

2009-05-12T02:06:00.003+08:00

Woke up and take a look on my phone... Omg, why so many messages. Crap, it was him=.='' Teasing me with his jeolousy and etc. really bth=.='' Don't keep ask me why I treat you in the way you don't like to be, just ask yourself have you ever consider my feeling when you mention those unknown girls name just purposely insult me or so on... What you know is talk and tease, nothing else. If you think I ever compete you and him, I won't. Because it's uncompete-able! You are selfish enough, selfish until you just care you joy and feeling but not considering mine too. That's why I won't let you have the way you want easily unless you finally know how to treat nicely and respect a person. However... You are on my chess board...

On back Ivalice RO and chat with friends. =)... I went to buy a new phone as my mum's belated Mothers Day present. W580i pink color, the color and model which is my mum love to have it. Quite nice actually, I mean the design of the phone. My mum was so happy when she see it. But, I teach her how to use the new phone till "vomit blood".

I went dinner with Ms. Je at Kim gary, Gurney. I was planning to ask them come out at night but seem like non of them got time to care about it. Haiz... Fine lo. Went to Bed too. Then only come back home.

8 more days to go, I'll leave Penang...... sigh

2nd time to Kampar but 1st time to Utar

2009-05-11T00:08:00.004+08:00

With Joyce and Mr.K, three of us went down to Kampar today. This time was I drive~ I was quite nervous because this is my first time drive out from Penang.

After having out breakfast, we start our journey at 11am+. I thought I might arrive Ipoh at least 1pm, but I was surprise. When I reach Ipoh, only 12pm+. Just took around 1 plus half hour. Of cause, all the way I drive quite fast. We went for a walk at Jusco at Ipoh, not really like there actually. Hmm, maybe to me like...abit weird...quite different with penang's malls. Met their friends there too.

Heading to Kampar around 2pm and reach there about 3pm already. See the surrounding there and have a look at the Utar which is my future U there. The University was so big @_@! I mean the compound aka space. Seriously, If the class start at 9am, reach the U gate at 845am will still late for class too I think. But I like there, especially the lake. After having our lunch at one of a famous hawker's there, we head back to penang around 430pm.

Ok, this time was fast too. We reach Penang at 6pm+... I was like wow?! We went to Queensbay for a walk and went to had our dinner at the Macalister Road there.

I felt safe when he is beside me everytime I went out or drive. Maybe because he is a guy. But he do help solve many of my problems. Thank to both of them actually for accompany me went down to Kampar at such a hot weather. And thank Mr.K for arranging all these and introduce me some new friend there so that I feel more comfortable and not as worried like before. At least I know a local friend who know Kampar well there. And Joyce too for following us there. I appreciate them=). Action>talk... Not like someone who just know how to insult or tease off people without helping anythings. Let it be then.

Tomorrow will be my late celebration for Mum's Day. Money again of cause... But hope my mum enjoy for 2mr~~

Not much traffic jams, lucky~

2009-05-09T23:05:00.002+08:00

Was planning on going to Gurney. Or maybe I should say I don't know why he asked me to go Gurney since he don't have the intention to switch the owner's name on the prepaid number. Well, ok lo... Since I was free too =).

Went to Gurney there with Mr.K and Joyce around 2pm. Went to the DSS over there and talk with a friend there. Goodness, I saw that cute girl there too... Bring another guy who I felt quite familiar with. Might be one of my ex-schoolmate or classmate, I can't remember clearly too. Kind of glad with seeing both of them there. At least the wander that I searching finally had the glue.

Ate my lunch at Wong Kok Restaurant and chatting there with them. Hmm, keep realise that less than 2 weeks to go, I am off... Sigh... After "throw" him to the temple, both of us went to Queensbay. Saw my supervisor and other ex-colleagues there, happy to see them.

Dinner time~! Because the down town there was having some serious traffic jams, so I went to Queensbay again with Ms. Je. Ate dinner at Johnny Restaurant, the food there is pretty good. Their staffs was friendly as well. Was planning to buy a phone for my mum's Mother's Day present. W580i or W910i ?? Don't know=.=''' W580i = RM530, W910i= RM599.... Hard to decide la... My stupid brother keep reply me "green vegetable", later I go buy G705 then he knows! GGness...muhahaha

Tomorrow going to Kampar ooo... Hope everythings goes well~ ^^

Happy Wesak Day~

2009-05-09T01:12:00.004+08:00

Morning and afternoon---> rotting at home "hugging" my laptop.

I actually asked my neighbour to examine my car's temperature meter, and seem that I have to waste another RM500 on it since it's spoiled. Dam it=.='' Total spending on the car is about RM1.5k already. If those friends who don't know those "incidents", I think they might thought I went to modify my car. Rim+meter wasn't the same anymore. I see my money flying away without wing~~~ sigh...

Evening, I went to temple for the praying ceremony. Almost every year I attending this temple's Wesak celebration but this year, it seem that getting more people going there already. Not only parking full but also human's traffic jams. I feel weird when I saw those youngster wear so sexy and make-up until so "fancy" to attend the ceremony. I mean they were having fashion show there or they afraid the god can't see them. So they purposely did it that way to attract attentions from human and gods? I was calm at beginning but I went crazy when I have to wait there so long yet the stupid kid behind keep kick my leg and do those kind of funny things. Her mum don't even care, I was about to scold her mum for not control and concerning about her kid's behaviour. However, I hold it. Since today was Wesak eve.

Around 11pm, I went to McDonalds and having my late dinner there with Ms. Je... Oh well, quite surprise me when I saw so many cars on the road. Ok, I understand, wesak oh wesak~
Road block happened when I was heading back home somemore ~_~

I seriously hope tomorrow please don't traffic jams everywhere. At least not the way to Gurney please.

Happy Wesak Day to all my friends ya~~

I love My daddy =)

2009-05-08T00:43:00.002+08:00

Was quite a boring day. Went to pray at temple and go to sunshine farlim shopping at afternoon. I bought 2 types of desserts there. 1 was the Yen ice cream or whatever. 1 was the Wildberry ice cream. My mum was like a kid, yelling me to buy them for her actually... @_@''

Yesterday was the donuts and today was the ice~ Memories again...haha

Our family plus my aunt and uncle went dinner at the restaurant or so called "Kopitiam" which is located opposite of the Chung Ling High School there. Hmm, not really in mood to eat those dishes. I was unhappy with my aunt's attitude, she don't even know how to respect my mum. I'm sick of it...sigh

I love my daddy, I know he love me most among us. I love you daddy~~~<3

Money Isn't Important, But No money is Important!

2009-05-07T00:20:00.004+08:00

I went to service my car today. It's OMG. My first ever car service that costed me about Rm1k, really sick of it. Oh well, don't misunderstand that I was being chopped or what. It's so expensive is because many of the parts spoiled. My car's rim 3 out of 4 had spoiled. Battery too. I changed my rim. I like the new rim design, but I heart pain with my wallet.

Here~

Nice right? =)

Today's dinner --> My favourite~~~ Big Apple Donuts~~ bought 6 and ate 5~~~. I remember the day that I had at the Donut's shop with him. It was so funny and nice. The "snow" would be my sweet memories forever. =)...

Ice cream too... Everythings I guess... I might forget how great that I love you, but those memories you gave would be remain forever in the deep part of my heart.

Beer...sick...@@''

2009-05-06T01:59:00.001+08:00

Around 2pm, I went out with Ms.Je to buy 2 present for today and 2mr's birthday girls. Was so headache what to buy for them. At last I found 2 little cute puppy dolls, so I decide to buy them.

Around 8pm, I went to my fren's birthday Party which is held on a Ktv near Penang road there. Quite nice environment but the sound system is not really up to standard. I was surprise when I found that they had order 8 buckets of beer. really OMG=.=''

Ok, because they were my secondary school fren, we really never meet each other quite a long period of time, so of cause I cant escape for being "cheer" which is Straight finish whole glass of beer 1 glass by 1 glass. I'm the most pitiful victims I guess, for not oftenly contact them, so straight have 10+ glass continously( I don't really count the exactly amount). I felt dizzy after that 10+ glasses. Luckily I request for going back home earlier, or else I bet I must be drunk until mad.

I feel headache and dizzy when I went back to my car. But I have to get myself in a certain conciousness because I have to drive. And obviously I can't go home yet, my mum and dad sure @#$$@#@$@#$. So I decide to find a place to sit down and rest for a while. I find Joyce, Mr.K and other but non of them seem free to bother me. I really disappointed actually, I drive from Georgetown to Queensbay and then back to Greenlane. Luckily Louis and her gf called me, and we meet at Gurney's McDonalds. I went there and have a rest over there. I feel my face very hot, but my hand was very cold. I get myself a hot milo and it seem that my dizziness was getting better. Thanks for both of them willing to accompany me. Or else I really don't know where I can wondering at.

I felt better after that anyway. Back to normal, you can see I still able to update my blog today(Although might have many mistakes)@@..

Time to rest and sleep I guess... Night all~~

First time to Kampar....So S***

2009-05-04T23:45:00.009+08:00

I bet today was the day I wake so early in the past 4 months. 6am wake up and prepare the things to Kampar. I took coach around 9am. The coach I had was so...."classic". It's because only few coach bus company have the schedules to Kampar. Thus the bus offered of cause won't be so comfortable one.

Was raining heavily at the time I went up the bus. Doh... Was so worry because too many of the bus accidents case, I quite scared to take bus actually but no choice. Luckily because the bus is old, so the driver drive in an average speed.

It was sunny once the bus pass the border line of Penang and Kedah, few more photos to go along the highway. I was too boring so I keep taking photos...

Well, I guess this is Ipoh. Not really have the time to took much photo that time because I was too excited to see the surroundings. Hmm, compare with Penang... Ipoh's road size is larger. I think the populations is similar with Penang. But to me, quite a boring one...Maybe I just glance through without really know the places there.

Around 1.30pm, the bus finally reach Kampar. It's takes 4 hours+ sia...Omg=.=''' My 1st comment when viewing on the Kampar town:"swt? It's like I going back to langkawi there." Ok, at least there're quite alot of Chinese there, which is I m glad to know. But they talk Cantonese more. I guess I have to practice back my rotten Cantonese in order to communicate with them more efficiently. Here, my one and only photo on Kampar town.

And this is the "house" I gonna stay when going to Kampar soon.

It's located at Westlake, 13??. I hope I can get used to stay there. Seriously it's like a countryside's place to me if you ask me what's Kampar all about. 1 more thing, NO MC'DONALDS there!!! OMG liao la....

I back to Penang after I settle those documents in the office. I took 5pm bus back to Penang and reach around 9pm. 10pm reached my lovely home.

For sure, I gonna miss Penang. Food, Place, Home, Friends and so on. Sigh.... I guess this is my day...

U don't know that I care everything about YOU

2009-05-03T23:24:00.003+08:00

I can't really slept tight yesterday or shall say today's early morning. Cause I saw something that really broke my heart into pieces again. I just don't know why when I see those photos, I will cry. But obviously, I know that's another lose game for me. Other than don't care it and ignore it, I really don't know what to do. I must remind myself that... FREN!...

I went to pray today. And went to buy Bus ticket for 2mr's, going to Kampar to settle the accommodation stuffs. I really worried about 2mr's journey. Whether Can or Will I reach there safety and many things else. First time going to Kampar though. Haiz... Gonna be boring till mad at bus I guess.

Sleep whole evening, maybe my brain was too tired this few days. Keep worry this and that non-stop. Of cause, I'm happy that my application to UTAR have been approved. But I didn't seem to be release or relax. I think it's would be my new coming challenge.

I was happy when I know you do read my PM at MSN. Even though I know maybe you don't really care, but at least you asked. No matter what is that, a small thing you've done to me would made me happy for few days. =)... Of cause luckily you won't read this, or else I would be in trouble lol....

Are you watching me from heaven?

2009-05-03T00:00:00.002+08:00

It was after 2 month from now... How are you there? I miss you. I failed to grant your wish for going back to Cabal o... Sry for that because I totally not in mood for gaming now, lots of problems I have to face now... Will you bless me for that?

I woke early today, dress nicely and went out with Ms. Je to shop at Queensbay Mall. Before we going, I went to somewhere passing my things to Mr.K. Well, just a glance on him today. Hope he is doing well there for the "unknown" event to me. We reach the mall around 2pm+. We had our lunch and shop there. I used alot of money today...for 1 t-shirt, cleanser, concealer and muscalar...T__T. I got no choice anyway, these are what I need anyway. I guess I have to cut down my spending after today.

Went to Tesco around 6pm and have dinner with Ms.Je's friend. My first time seeing her actually, well everythings went just nice. Wonder is he ok over there, >.<'' I actually quite happy today=)... A glance brighten my day? Lol, silly....

Dead Meat

2009-05-02T01:02:00.005+08:00

I was like a dead fish today. Lying on bed and keep thinking how to solve the problems I'm having. The major trouble is that I have to go Kampar at this Monday. To settle the contract and keys stuffs. Of cause I hope everythings goes smoothly but I really headache with my parents. It's annoying me with their "cute" thinking.

I was in bad mood whole afternoon. Actually I decide to go out at night to relax myself but it seem that the one I wish to see was unable to make it tonight. Sigh... Nevermind... Food are always the "one" that recover my mood. Especially my favourite... CAKE!!!!!

(bought it from Jenny's Cake House, cost RM26)

I bought a fruit cheese cake and shared with Ms.Je... It's cheap ->rm 26 for a whole one. I ate half of them and my mood was better. But once I get my ass back home, I feel stress and pressure again. Mean I have to face the problems all by myself again, no one could or even can help me. Of cause I will be a million thank you for those who trying not to add oil on my burning fire. I'll skinned them alive if I found they doing it for sure.

I don't feel like staying at home. I feel I cant breathe with the flooding of endless troubles nor problems. I have to solve it anyway but at least give me a break. I really hope they're able to accompany me for going to somewhere where I can get a fresh breath and relax maybe. But I know they are busy with their own stuffs. Hopefully everythings went smooth at their places. Good luck for all my fellow friends and hope they are doing well.

Looking forward for tomorrow's shopping~~ I got plenty of things to buy~_~''' Money again... sigh

Almost granted all....

2009-05-01T01:50:00.002+08:00

I woke quite early today, because I cant sleep well yesterday. And I have to fetch Joyce go to work as it's raining heavily. It's my first time having lunch at my home at 1230pm since the days I came back from my "house" at 2008. I fetch Wyne back Salon after the lunch. Whole afternoon doing nothing. Just tired and sleepy, so I take a nap until 6pm++.

I went to Gurney at 830pm with Ms.Je and Mr.K to have my dinner at the Taiwan Restaurant. Actually I plan to book cakes there but at last I think I'll go to Jenny cake house to do it since they said it's better than the Bread History one. Of cause, I still remember last year's Mother Day. I booked cake at Bread History but in the end I can't get my cake at all, because of their stupid mistake and I failed to get my mum's favourite cake. It was a Biggest Disappointment towards that stupid cake house.

Around 10pm, I drop Ms.Je back home and fetched Joyce. We went to GasOnline cafe which is located at the new Times Square there. It was my first time step into Penang Times Square, that cafe is still ok but too bad today isn't a good time for us to be there. Cause of a bunch of idiots keep taking photos there, the camera shot light was so bright and it cause me big headache. zzzzzz.... Really brainless, I don't understand that keep taking photo at such a dark place is as fun as that?? Rofl... The drink I ordered was so ... The light headache + the drink headache = totally big headache. ~_~ Last round, I decide to go Gurney Drive to breath some fresh breezes.

We do plan to go somewhere at this coming 15/16th May. Hopefully it can goes according the plan. My last 3 wishes... 1 already granted.. left the last 2.... Please goes smooth or else it would be my biggest regret and disappointment in my life.

___

2009-04-30T01:52:00.002+08:00

Quite a Boring day to me. However, around 5 pm I went to Macallum Raod to fetch mr.K and thought going to find our ex-colleague to do the postpaid supplimentary line stuff. Because I'm not really feel to go see them as I will feel awkward. I give A sales, B sure blame why I din't give him... So in the end I decide ask Mr.K alone go deal with them.

Prepaid is really expensive=.=''' Please faster switch to postpaid...T__T...

I went to have dinner with Ms.Je at KFC main restaurant, and I went to Sunrise fetch Wyne around 1030pm. We went to Bed cafe and drink coffee there... We chat alot of things... I quite enjoy because Wyne is here today. I got plenty of things to tell her. =)

Quite a simple day for me but excited because my best friend is here^_^

Bor, Bore, Bored, Boring...

2009-04-29T00:09:00.007+08:00

Quote of the day: It's rude for a guy to mention an unknown girl's name in front of a girl. Same goes to the girl too. But every rules have its exceptions...

______________________________________________________________________

28th of April 2009

Woke up and staring my phone. Finally it ported to Digi Prepaid, great news I think?

Was felt very lazy, as in lazy to wake up from bed... But no matter how also have to do it, cause I was hungry. Sad when I found out my mum doesn't cook lunch for me, too bad for that and I have to find food myself, I was too lazy to go out because of the stupid weather.

This is what I found and it was my lunch ~_~''

And of cause I'm not on diet! But what to do?! sigh....

Luckily I know that I can have my dinner outside today because finally got someone is available to accompany me after 1 week. Weee~~ We went to Gurney Plaza's Sakae Restaurant. My soft shell crabby~~~~~~~ Yum yum~~~ But I realize the price changes for some of the sushi. Like the Unagi Toufu, I remember it's rm5.90!!!!! Hell, now goes to rm6.90~_~, and the unagi on top is getting lesser than the last time one. Arghh~! Luckily my crabby prices still remain the same, the tastes too^_^.

While I was having my wonderful dinner, I was chatting with ms.Je... She reminds to eat more because soon I can't have them frequently at Kampar. That's bugged me u know. T___T Sad ='(... I scared of the arrival of that day where I have to go Kampar...T_______________T. I scared I will lose the things I'm having now... Friendships nor someone...

And 1 more things! I miss out my Donuts today!!!! I was too full for it, so I think I'll have them tomorrow^_^

Time doesn't wait and never stop...

2009-04-27T23:52:00.003+08:00

I drive through a primary school today. And it's was 6pm+, it's the time they finish their lessons and going home. Of cause, 1 thing that cannot avoid--> Traffic Jams! I saw parents fetch their kids back by cars and motorcycles. I am kind of envy...towards them suddenly. I didn't have that before, I walked, take school bus or public buses but I never had a chance like that before. Sigh, that was a couple of years ago... Luckily I learned how to drive and I doesn't have to suffer the days with the stupid buses..

I went to Queensbay today with Shu Yi. 1st is to settle the porting stuff, finally I can port to hotlink today and digi prepaid at 2mr! I guess around Tuesday or Wednesday I can back to postpaid. The prepaid is really hell expensive, I made a call shortly but my 36cents fly away... doh...>.<'' I wonder how I can survive with the rate for prepaid...But of cause, if SMS, Prepaid is cheaper and worth than postpaid. I got dam alot of sim cards now=.='''

1 more on the phone~_~''...

It's end of the April now. May is coming soon. The days where I leave Penang is nearer and nearer. Hopefully I can get a nice place to stay and can get to know great friends there. I definately will miss everythings in Penang. I miss donuts and Ice cream, not only the food but also the memories at the shop. The way you introduce these food to me... The snow and the funny part of it...

Finally, ms Je.. finished her exam! I finally don't have to eat dinner alone~~ weee... I look forward on Wednesday, Friday and the coming gathering with you guys...

我还真没用，对吗？

2009-04-26T23:28:00.006+08:00

每天在家都闷到透顶，难得今天是星期日而又没人约出门，就答应了北海朋友我会去那儿走走。我不带想驾我的车过去，因为我完全不懂北海的路是怎样绕的，所以还是硬着头皮一个人从Jetty搭船过去。一直以来我很少自己一个人出门，而今天我自己一个人要去一个我不带熟悉的地方，就有很多顾虑了。

我把车子停在对面的car park，而要到达Jetty，一定要走一段路和过行人天桥哦。走着的当儿，我都很不好过，因为心理莫名其妙的产生一种害怕的感觉，害怕一个人走这一段路。走到行人天桥的楼梯口，无端端一辆车停在我前面，大声喊道：“小姐去哪里？我载你去要吗？”，不知是幸运还是不幸，我没戴眼镜出门，所以我的视线是非常的模糊。我只瞪了他一眼，丢下一句话就走人了。那句话就是：“你的车懂得游泳吗？”，我看不清楚他的模样，可是这让我更加觉得不安。尤其是当上到去走廊那儿，好多姓马的人哦，而我也好怕看到他们看我的眼神。等了五分钟，船终于到了，可我还是很害怕哦，直到上了船、坐跟一个老太太我在安心下来。

今天我承认是我故意不要驾车，要试一试我是否能够克服这一点害怕。因为我一直以来都很怕一个人出街，我很不喜欢那个感觉。可是看来我还真是不行，觉得自己好没用哦。朋友们都常会说：“自己一个人出门有什么大不了，又不会要掉你的命！” ，可是为什么我却那么的害怕单独出门。当然，我不想有第二个今天，我真的无法熬过去，如果不是有那个老太太，我看我早就哭了。哎~！当然也谢谢那时打电话来的他，不然就~唉~！

闹了整个下午，回到家时竟然对自己说, 还好我今天平安回到家里了。

Pretty Day

2009-04-26T01:44:00.002+08:00

Was quite boring at the afternoon, "hug" the texas poker at facebook again and woohoo, keep "sai lang" people's chips. Muhahaha... but not everytime win of cause...

Around 8pm, I went to fetch Mr.K as I asked him to accompany to go find my ex-colleague to take my commisions aka incentives. Before I fetch him, I went to petrol station and wow! The fuel price reduce 3 cents! wee, although abit different but I'm glad with it.

1st destination is to go "Ai Xin Da Xia", which is the place where my ex-colleagues was. I saw my supervisor there and boss too. My supervisor do chat with me, but I felt somethings happen behind when I quit the job. I read it from my supervisor face, and at last she told me. I went in to the hall with her too while waiting the stuff being settle at other side. There was a talk about "love at home", about parents vs children and how to maintain the relationship at the best condition. We leave half way and heading to other place to settle some stuffs.

I had my dinner at "Old Green House" but the food is like water, no taste at all~_~'''' We do chat alot today and surprisingly(maybe not surprise anymore), he quite gentle today. Everythings is nice and smooth-going today. But only the part which is... Stupid Jason! Wait him till my neck getting longer and longer! lol... Go Pak tor say ma, no need to act so "secret"...

Hopefully things will be in good condition too at next few gathering with them...

Endless Problems attacking me...

2009-04-24T23:47:00.002+08:00

Sigh, bad new received at the moment I woke up. It's about the "house" that we going to rent. It's a double storey house. Upstairs got 3 rooms and downstair got 1 room. Thanks to those, they left me the only 1 room at downstair. I feel unsecure and unfair with it. Why 5 of us paying the same amount of money but they can choose the rooms that they like and I can't? It's unfair for me! It bugged me alot and ruin my mood today. Pif...

Second things is Maxis! Hell, today I have to go there again to settle the stuff and when only it can convert?! Stupid newbie!..zzz

Whole evening spending my time with the Texas Poker with Kenny, Jack and their friends. Quite funny with them lol... Watched some dramas on TV and keep "cook porridge" at handphone. Hope my other friends could help me get a better house or room there.

Actually I plan to go to find Mr.Heng to get my incentives. But I'm too lazy to do so, so I think I will find him tomorrow. I was surprise that he will call me...=) ..XD...

Hope my problems would be solve as soon as possible so I don't have to suffer.

Maxis --> Omfg

2009-04-24T00:57:00.003+08:00

I was planning to switch my whole Digi Postpaid to another operators so that I can kick my supplimentary lines away. Because I thought of convenience, I choose to port to Maxis. However, I really unsatisfied with the service there. Especially the newbie who serve me, I know better than he is. Really speechless....zzzz. Thank to him, tomorrow I have to go that hell place again.

Joyce asked me out tonight with Jason and mr.K. Before going to meet Jason, 3 of us went to Tesco around 9pm to visit Louis kor kor. I saw "Happy" doing Roadshow there and thinking to get a number there, but the numbers left are not really satisfy me so I forget about it. Jason met us at there around 930pm and we decided to go to "Padang" there to sit and eat. Around 11pm, we switched place to Gurney Drive and sit at the seaside there chatting. It was very funny when Jason was there. Because he always bring up alot of jokes that allow to me laugh non-stop. We eat "tao hua" and chat again and until 12++am only went home.

Although because of Maxis's stuff ruin my mood abit in the noon time, I was quite happy today overall. At least I guess today is the best planning among all our gatherings. And I am glad with the way he did today although he was so noisy there and keep joke with me lol, I notice alot of things that make me happy. I know you facing some pressure because of the coming event, hope you can do it with your best and good luck there. Same goes to Mr. da ben dan sharkie hoh...=P

By the way, I'm selling some VIP numbers ( for Malaysia only ). If interested please leave a message here or msn me for details.

No Fuels...

2009-04-22T23:05:00.002+08:00

Quote of the day: I have seen that some forum that dealing those VIP number. When dealing with the postage, they request a photocopy IC from the buyer. Please, DON'T EVER SHARE YOUR IC OR IC PHOTOCOPIES WITH STRANGER!

Reason: Those idiots will take your IC or IC's photocopy to do many illegal things, a very common example is they can use that simply register a postpaid from some brainless dealer and use it without paying the bills. In the end your IC will get blacklisted. Once blacklisted, you would never have chances to register any postpaid or register some other relevant things. And you may receive lawyer's letter due to outstanding bills.

So PLEASE BEWARE!

____________________________________________________________________

It was a very, extremely hell boring day to me. I rot at home do nothing.

Joyce called me and asked me about which place to choose for her 1st "treating". She decided either northam hotel's buffet or G hotel's buffet. And she request me to inform 2 ben dans and asked their opinions. Well, actually both me and Mr.K thought of going Tao because price is similar. However, I think I still respect on the final "owner" decision. Thank you that I was one of them who you wanted to treat..=)

I talked with my dad via phone at night time. After that phone call, I really headache now... 1st, I shouldn't so fast quit my work. If I work 1 more month mean I will get more money to earn. When I go to kampar, I m sure that my expenses will be increase like hell.

House deposit, furniture, study fees, foods and petrol. Somemore I still have to pay for my new car soon monthly. I gonna sick with that... Money... Hell...>.<'' If we don't get a new car later, the one suffering will be me. But if we own a new car, the one who suffer will also be me. My god...
I will drive the current car to Kampar but my dad don't allow me to drive back to Penang in future unless I finish my course. And I said I want to go back once every 2 weeks, also have been objected. Which mean when I come back to Penang, I got no vehicle to use, so I have to walk? zzzz...

When leaving Penang, I'm sure I will hell missing Penang... Miss all my friends...>.<... Miss the days we hang out. Miss the ice cream, the donuts and so on. And I just can't accept 1 thing... If that happen, I don't know how to face you... really...

It was too late now. When I was decide whether to stay Penang or to go Kampar, you didn't said anythings but now you ask me to stay... too late... Maybe is time for us to find our own way and place that belong to each of us. You have your path to follow, and I got my way to go. I just hope you and the other will keep in touch with me when I'm not around. I would be happy to see urs calls and messages.

女生们不能错过的十种男生

2009-04-22T15:44:00.003+08:00

第一种：他懂得尊重你
他对你的爱比要求多，他对自己有主见，对你则不会太有主见。他尊重你作出的各种人生选择，鼓励你发展自己的专长。现代好男人的一条重要标准是，尊重所有的女性，包括仅有一面之缘的人。

第二种：他的追求很有诚意
他不属于你十分喜欢的异性类型，但是他追你追得很有诚意，而且你喜欢的类型，再多都是失败的例子。他有你前任男友的优点，但没有你前任男友的缺点，而且他有的优点，很多人都没有。

第三种：他对你嘘寒问暖，关爱体贴
他已经很熟悉，虽然没有了热恋的心跳感觉，但他确实比任何人都关心你，在你苦恼时，他永远站在你这边，耐心倾听你倒苦水；他记得你提过的朋友名字；你渴时他轻轻递上茶水……这些都无声地传达他真心喜欢你的信息。

第四种：你的家人朋友欣赏他
长辈们经风历雨阅人无数，眼睛自然比你毒。你对他很挑剔，但他却很能够赢得你朋友、家人的欣赏。他懂得让每个人心情舒畅，懂得给人安全感。从性格上说，他不是一个非常易变的人，不会让你觉得很难把握和相处。

第五种：他提很多对你有益处的要求
他对你要求很多，但是都很合情合理，而且这些要求对你有好无坏。这样的男友是真心爱护你的。

第六种：他胸襟开阔，宽容忍让
两人发生争执，通常是他最先让步。他懂得如何表达自己，并耐心听你说话，如果你是对的，他能够承认错误；即使你不对，他也愿意原谅你。有话可以好好讲，不会动不动就拉下脸来，送你一脸的表情暴力。也不会为一点小事发脾气成赌气，自虐虐人.

第七种：他有自己的爱好，有运动的习惯
有某种运动爱好的男子，较容易找到情绪的出口，不会没事找事的折磨你，和一个心中有热情的男人在一起时，日子就会充满乐趣。一个能在生活中找到自己爱好的那人一定会给人生机勃勃的感觉。

第八种：他对感情无怨无悔
一个男人一辈子会有多少次恋爱，他在不断的实践中获得经验让自己完善起来。“专一”的定义并非是他只能一生爱一人，而是每爱一个人的时候他都一心一意。如果他曾经有过刻骨铭心的感情经历，并为此真心付出过，那么至少可以证明他是个深情，敢于承诺的男人，一个愿意为感情破裂分担部分责任的男人。

第九种：向他倾诉是安全的
他能开诚布公地与你沟通，他懂得倾听，知道什么时候该说话，什么时候该闭嘴。你不会害怕对他表达，当你和他分离自己的感受与思想时，能觉得安全。良好沟通的基础是信任，在他面前，你确信不会因为表达内心深层想法而遭受到嘲笑或伤害。这就叫安全感。

第十种：不会因为朋友而忽略你
他有正常的社交圈，有彼此信赖的好朋友，也重视他们，但他不会为了朋友而把你晾在一边。他能够独立思考和行动，而非唯朋友是从。并且，不需要你耳提面命，他就能清楚掌握女朋友与异性朋友的分界。

(from E-mail)

Share with you all here. So, which 1 is you?? or your love one? Hmm...

So far the one I like are with no. 4, no.8 and no.10... =)

Missing the old days

2009-04-22T01:51:00.002+08:00

After few days didn't touch jxworld online, finally today I play back because I really bored. Sushido was so lag until I unable to play happily.

i really don't know why that stupid Joyce can't organize a well gathering. Everytime she was the one suggest but I have to follow up with the other after that. I really sick of that...>.<''' and of cause, today once again it happened. No choice, I have to call them last minute to inform the venue and time.

Around 830pm, I fetch Joyce and we went to Gurney because I had somethings to buy there. Unfortunately, I can't find it. I guess I have to find it else where. We went to coffee island to meet other around 950pm. Today we had Louis, his gf, Mr.K and Joyce and finally add up 2 more who were Jason and William. After that, 3 of us( 2 J and me) was sitting at the car chatting. Actually I was happy to see all of them but somehow I feel abit awkward, maybe is because few days never see them? or maybe my memory ability is getting worst like 1 day but felt it like 1 week?

I guess that all today. Simple day and half boring day. But still glad to going out with them...

Cleaning and cleaning, hope I could clean my hurts as well...

2009-04-20T23:33:00.010+08:00

I did alot cleaning works today. From car to room, room to laptop(I meant arrange my desktop and software). While I was cleaning my room, I found many things that I lose last time. But 1 things that made me replay back alot of old's scenie... The ring that he gave during Valentine's Day of 2007. That was my first time received ring as present. He made promise with that ring too.However, the promise no longer exist. Of cause, I miss that day very much, I mean the situation but not missing the person ahhh...

Around 7pm, Went to Office to take a sim card and rush to Bukit Jambul Complex to give a existing customer with Shu Yi. Funny... I already quited the job but I still have to meet customer for the sake of my ex-colleague. And we had our dinner at KFC restaurant and reached home around 10.

I quited the job for 23 days, nearly 1 month. I miss the days I worked there. I miss alot of people and things. Why suddenly become so sentimental? I don't know... Maybe I know I am leaving or left somethings that no-turning-back. My feeling towards him is still exist, but not as warm as previous. Happy with it because until now, he don't even notice it. Am I too good in acting? Sad with it because until now, he DON'T EVEN know about it. Stupid or pretending? I don't know...

haiz....

Hyper Hot and Heat~_~''

2009-04-20T00:14:00.007+08:00

Today's weather was so hot. Shi yan came to find me and asked me to hang out. First, we went to Queensbay Mall to had our lunch. Because really don't know what to eat, so our final decision --> TGI friday. It's my second times to enter and have my meal in this restaurant. My first time was with my aunties.

Well, I notice the price for the set meal now is different from last time. It's getting cheaper. Last time I remember Rm39.90 for 1 set meal but now it's RM29.90 per set meal with appetizer and Main Dish or so called "Entree". I was quite satisfied with my set which was Sizzling Chicken with cheese, cause I love CHEESE! The dessert that served was in a small cute glass. Just like a normal mocha latte have been resize to baby size. Well, luckily it was not size like the normal one. Or else I really can't finish it because I was very full with the appetizer and the chicken.

(Mocha Latte and Tropical Delight)

(I was having this)

After lunch, We went to PC fair located at PISA. Luckily I wasn't the one who drive, or else I'm sure will faint at the car. Traffic jam + Traffic jam and somemore hot! From Queensbay to PISA normally take less than 10 minutes but today we took 45 minutes until we get a place to park. The traffic jam was not only apply on vehicles but also on human...=.='' Sick of that...

I bought a Hard Disk with 160GB storage and a mouse. Both cost for RM200 sharp! Hell, I waste alot of money today. >.<... But this two things I have to get them or else, 1st, My laptop hard disk gonna full and I din't plan to format it. 2nd, my old mouse went crazy and it "bite" me... LOL... reach home at 7pm. Whole evening and night, killing my time with my laptop. Playing Sushido and staring at facebook.

I was kind of surprise when I heard from my friend that Mr.Heng already broke with his "soft drink", then I doubt the GF he mentioned to me that day was new 1? hmm. Good luck to him then=)... I'm envy with those friends around me, they get their lovely BFs or GFs. But me, NONE. Well, of cause I can't control the fate. It goes the way it should be...

It would be a boring monday for me I think... sigh... I hate to be alone and rotting at home...

Another bored one...

2009-04-19T01:48:00.002+08:00

My mum's friend brought us some deep fried fish slices today, they were so delicious... I had it with my lunch. I hope my mum would learn how to do it, cause I really love it... But I going to Kampar soon, the chances get to eat this might be lesser I think...

Because of too boring, I read back Breaking Dawn, the last series of Twilight. And Viwawa-ing with the Big 2.5... It was bored until unable to describe... But rare things happen! Joyce msg me and ask me go to drink coffee tonight... Well, my mum going out tonight anyway, so I guess I won't be so bored if I go out with them I guess.

I went out roughly around 10pm and fetch her to Coffee Island. Another rare thing is today will be lack of someone... Only 4 of us who were Joyce, me, William and his Gf. Both of us the girls arrive earlier than the other do. When they reached already 12am, which is late about 1 hour plus, but nevermind to me as at least they came. However, the 1st conversation to me was "Hmm? Where is your XXXX?", I was stoned for a while and told her he was not around. As usual, we playing cards there and chat. His Gf introduce me a game in Viwawa, named Sushido and I think I start get interest with it. It's awesome...

I don't understand why people wouldn't stop saying both of us even I quit the job lol... It's not irritating but just kind of funny. Do you all think both of us so match enough to be the things that you all were thinking? I do heart him or maybe I should say I did, but somehow I feel sort of weird for being like this... I mean liking him who has alot of bad habits and don't even know primary stage of respect.

Love is Blind! I believed that always... sigh. Because of this, I had troubled myself alot. But the memories are mostly sweet with a little bit of bitter... Of cause, I would never admit I would regret on every relationships or love that I'm/was in

I miss you always but you don't know it... sad='(

2009-04-18T00:50:00.003+08:00

Another boring day I had. Whole day rot at home doing nothing. However, I really enjoy my mum's cooking. Maybe I have been months never have them due to work and outing. I feel the dishes today was delicious. Today is god damn hot, I was sweating whole afternoon. It's like heaven when I took a cold drink from refrigerator and drink it lol...

Someone ask me : "when you want to find yourself a BF?" today. I really kind of hard to answer it. Well, It's not my will for don't want BF that love me now, but it's out of my control too. I mean I can't get a "idol" BF as I wished right? Of cause, in my bottom of my heart... I miss him... The one so close yet so hard for me to express and get him. It's getting worst now since we less outing and so on... Well, I admit that now my feel towards him is not as strong as before, maybe I'm on my way to give up to this no-happy-ending's love? But I still miss him everyday too. Doubting what he's doing and etc...

Well, thanks to yeenli because she still remember that I need helps for my Kampar's stuff. I already found my "house" there and thank for concern me about it... I'm worrying about the U and Kampar's things. I really scare for being alone. Even now, I scare for being alone and bored. If you want me to drive and go somewhere alone... I feel kind of afraid and strange, I need someone to accompany everytime I go out. My weakness is getting "outstanding" huh... But serious, I hate "loneliness", hate to be abandon or hate doing somethings alone too... I'm so useless..=.=''

Haiz... When go to Kampar, I'm sure I will be alone too...will i survive? T__T I will be very appreciate if my friends will sms me or call me more frequently when I gone to the "boring town". I pleased...

It was so boring and frustrated...

2009-04-17T02:13:00.005+08:00

Woke late today, cause I know I don't have anythings to be done. After having my lunch, I just staring on my pc again. It was my first time login IvaliceRO since 4 days ago, and I notices that some of the character's outfits had changed. Well, I feel kind of funny when I can't even identify the character with the new outfits. And besides of the High Priest and High wizard's outfit, the other look disgusting... Like orangutans...

Below are new outfit (Sry I can't find my old screenie)

Well, What do you think?

After this crap, I went to have dinner at Chung Nam's Western Food store. I miss the Fish Cordon Blue there... Yummy... It's satisfied my marginal utility to maximum. I asked my friends to meet up at night for "Yam Cha" but it seem like it was another failure outing again. I was so pissed off with 2 person actually because 1 absent and 1 was late around 1 hour and 30 minutes, but for god sake, I don't know why I just can't scold out as I wished. I admit that my tolerance have been improved after I worked as a Sales Advisor.

Beginning with 2 person who are Louis and Me. Then Mr.K add-up after his other outing was finish. The latest 1 was Joyce! I wanted to scold her and I know Louis was impatient. But I still fail to scold her. Maybe after this, I try to control myself not to ask her out. But will other wanted to see her only decide whether to come or not... I don't know... zzz

I felt sorry to Louis actually... >.<... Hell, sry dude. I didn't mean to organize another failure outing again since the last time at Sunset Bistro...

Ask me If you love me...

2009-04-16T00:30:00.002+08:00

Not an outstanding day, but happy that I am able to met my old friends. Like Gie Yeng and Qiao Ling. We went to red box at 12pm(kinda early and I had to rush like mad). Enjoy until 3pm there. Thinking back to those incident that happened last time in secondary school, I feel kind of... Sick...

Well, to other secondary school period might be the most memorable time but to me it's worst nightmare in my entire life. But at least what I can gald about is I got few friends left which is still remember my existance. They might not really close to me, but at least they care me sometime. Sad to know that I'm always the lonely 1. Friends that can lend me a pair of ears and lend me shoulders? rare like diamond... Friends that only know to get me when having problems or troubles? Plenty like sand. I m such a failure in my relationship i guess... Of cause, I hope that one day I will meet a guy that I could depend on him. Can accompany me always, willing to hear my heart and be kind and gentle to me...loyal maybe? lolx

Time just like one-way train, fast and no turning-back. Soon I will leave Penang and get a new life at Kampar, I am nervous and curious. I'm sure I will miss everyone here at Penang. Especially those who always join me hang out. I wonder how much time I left... I really scared the day arrive when I have to leave, because I'm afraid some of you will forget me after that. And I really hope you won't forget me...>.<...

Haiz... I love these quotes, " There's not such things as "Co-incident", everything is controlled by fate" And of cause, "You ask for it, You Pay for it..."

True Loves are always out of stock

2009-04-15T01:23:00.007+08:00

Finally I settle all my application things for the Utar registration. Finish all of the procedures at post office, glad that the fellow there is kind enough to explain to me everythings because I am a noob at the post's... And my friends or should say my future housemate sent me few photos about our future "house" in Kampar.. Well, not bad in the day-time... But don't know about the night-time scene view only... haha.. Here you go:

- I think is a living room

- Kitchen

- Bedroom

- Front look of the house

Hopefully everythings is alright there =)...

Was wondering about today's hang out planning and thanks to that "cute" organizer, Ms.Joxxx, seem like I care it more than she does and she doesn't plan everythings well. Around 630pm, I fetch Mr.T to office a while and I saw my ex-colleagues. Well, I'm glad that they look happy when they saw me, and I met my ex-supervisor too. Of cause, they were still the same, always practising "bird languages" as keep saying those crap about both of us again=.='''... I try my best to leave as earlier as I could of cause...

After fetch Joyce, I drop her at Gurney Plaza. Sort of sweatness because she leave me T_T... Mr.T suggest to have dinner before we go to Queensbay. We had our dinner at Burma Road's Western Food with his friends. I felt awkward >.<.. Besides keep staring at the phone and I really no idea what to do... I was wishing that the time could past faster. I think I'll feel better if they speak to me but too bad they were not a good socializer i guess. So just kept quiet until they left and we went Queensbay then back to Gurney.

I met Louis and his gf there and Joyce's best friend named Vivian too. Of cause, I can't dodge that "crap" again. Really hope that one day they would stop this kind of "joke"? Please don't say that me n him got kind of couple aura... Cause I don't think we does! =.='' Of cause, I wont said it's impossible, but it won't happen now I think...

Around 9 somethings, 4 of us went to Bed and playing cards there like we always did. Jason joined us around 1030 and we had our supper around 12 without Joyce and Vivian. That's the whole tuesday for me...

I try not to think too much nor extra, just let it goes to the way it suppose to be better. Take it easy too. But!!!

I HATE those who don't care or don't know how to care other's feeling! That type of person, slaughter them into 18-pieces and throw it to feed pigs also the pigs won't even bother them. zzzzz!

Looking for a stable RO private server?? Here you are~

2009-04-14T00:42:00.006+08:00

(from IvaliceRO's forum banner)

Well, advertising a Ragnorak Online private server here - IvaliceRO... Stable(definately more stable than the official one), fair and balance(drop rate and so on), friendly GM team and more...

No matter how perfect I describe it, you wouldn't know it until you try it out..

Click Here to check tis out!

Download all the relevant links for the patches and paste them on your KRO/ERO folders will do. Ohya, before that please make sure you register an ID on the forum to access and download or whatever you want to do with...

Boring day

2009-04-14T00:35:00.002+08:00

After quited the job, I really very free until rot at home with spider webs and mushrooms. Really really boring until I got no idea what to do or start up with...>.<

Thinking to go out or hang out...(No one accompany me and I hate going out ALONE!). Playing Online Games? (Too bored for me, wonder why I just can't be like last time)... Sleep? (I m not a piggy!) haiz... Frustrating....

Hoping that I can give up him completely or else the hurt 1 is me... lol... Trying my best of cos...

Same Case

2009-04-13T01:51:00.002+08:00

Totally a boring day I had today. Staring the laptop for hours to see whether my character is ok or not in jx. I m playing new game by the way. Visit this for more details Click Here. I'm a sword Wudang there and I reached lv 25 only=.=''' noobie there. It's similar like jx2, and it remind me the time I was playing jx2 online with Steven. Miss the days... =)

Had my dinner at KFC restaurant with Ms. Je... and when back home around 10pm. I was wondering is that person back to penang safely lol... Well, Why should I care=.=''' I m stupid...

Ms. Je tell me her things. About that Mr. U of cos.. Well, I know she sure feel hurt when Mr U tell her he "simply" accept another girl as his gf. What kind of human is that=.='' He's so stupid meh?? The girl in front of him is in love with him but he went to accept someone at KL there. really Wth he is =.='''
But same case happening to me too. That idiot don't know about my feeling toward him too... I guess both me and Ms. Je can voice the same phrase :" I was standing in front of you, but sadly you don't know that I love you and you always did somethings that up set me"...

Love hurts anyway... Especially to love someone secretly without exposing to let other know about it is kinda pain and hurt like hell. Of cause, we love them secretly and don't want to expose it is because we don't want to lose a friend for just being like that. Maybe before telling him, we still can chat nicely and go out together, and after telling him all about this, he might be avoiding us, right?

I hope you will know it before I gave up completely too, but what's the point for letting you know about this? doubting lol....

Horoscope Again

2009-04-12T13:28:00.004+08:00

I get this from another blogger. To see your own zodiac/horoscope, Click Here

It's quite an accurate and details about you and you's (but mine is not really accurate)... Take a look =)

Leo Woman
She will stand out of the crowd on the street. Leo woman normally tall or rather tall. You will hardly see a short thick woman. When she walks she walk like a queen, confident and does not look around, though as if there is no one around her.She will dress in her own style not according to fashion. She is confident of what she choose to wear. Do not buy cheap cloths where they sell in dozen for her as a gift, she will hate it. Also do not buy cloths that do not reflect her confident personality. She likes unique and strange cloths and accessories. Being different is what she loves.If you want to know her, take times and be patient because she is selective about people she mingles with. She's open minded, but yet she is not letting people get to close to her easily. She likes sweet words and compliments, but not too much.She smiles with anyone, but inside she thinks she is borne to be a leader. She likes to be in control because it is in her nature instinct. She is a graceful woman , and she has a magnetic charisma, so expect tough competition.She is a very proud person, so do not do anything to challenge her confident. She can be mad and act like a hurricane, and later can be like an innocent kitten, but do not fall for her O.K. She remembers everything and likes to cherish her sweet memory, so if you find her old photo albums with her ex-boyfriend or love letters that will make you puke, take it easy. She is keeping her sweet memory does not mean she still in love with the old fool, so you do not have to panic.She will have many guys run after her, so if you have advantage of a good background family, or a famous last name, a successful career then it's a plus. She hates to be poor and she thinks love will not pay bills.She is a sport type and love sports. If you want to date her, prepare to spend big bugs, for your first dinner with her can not be a hot dog stand, but better be the best place in town. She is a generous person, so do not be surprise if she give you a gift more expensive than what you gave her. She likes extravaganza, no cheap gift, no cheap dinner please. Being poor or broke make her depress. If you do not have lots of money, be creative and make your own gift for her. It's unique quality and times spending making it for her is a big deal. You can think economical, but do not be cheap.

p/s: I don't prefer expensive things, but I like unique... And I don't prefer to have dinner at the best place in town for my dates. It's kind of waste for me. As long as it's comfortable and safe then is alright lol... If I love somebody, that somebody doesn't have to be very perfect in all aspects or family background. What's important is my feeling towards him...LOL!

I read all horoscope's and I found this are so true:

-from Libra Man
He never knows when he makes you unhappy. He never knows how he up set you. He will never knows what he said wrong

-from Libra Women
She is a little flirt even she has no idea what she wants. She can not decide what to do, and what not to do, so she can not set her schedule very well in all cases

-from Scorpio Man
He is a very patient man and can waits for years to reach his goal. He hates thin feeling and weak determinations. He can not retreat or rest for long, for he thinks life has more questions and more answer to be searched

A letter that can't reach you....

2009-04-12T01:30:00.002+08:00

Today was saturday, my mum yelled at me at noon=.='' She said she din't cook today so keep repeat the same fact -> Ask me settle my own lunch. Well, no choice but I trying to figure out who can I ask for lunch and hanging out around. Since Ms.Je going to library for her study, I called my "sister" to accompany me.

We went to Queensbay and I returned my last t-shirt to my supervisor. She was so happy when saw me come. I'm glad that today she was in good mood. Or else she won't even bother me i think. We had our lunch at Nippon Yataimura, well... Feel like the taste not really as good as before. Though my sis, I finally get contact with 1 of my old friend, Siu Ping. Weeeee.....

After lunch, I went to Bukit Jambul Complex to visit my secondary school's old friend, Gie yeng. Hmm, seem like she is doing great. Finally she back to his x-bf or shall say his bf's side. I am happy for her..=)... She asked me to "yam cha" tonight. Thus I accept her invitation but I have to fetch her at night around 9.30pm. So I fetch my sis back 1st of cause.

I used 15 mins to reach her workplace because I going out late, around 915pm. We went to Bed cafe and chat alot of things. About me and her's... We chat until 12am and I have to fetch her back to her home, at Sungai Ara, a place that seem quite "unknown" to me. Well, no choice... I sent her back and trying to figure out how to go home...T_T... Luckily I can reached home safely. =)

A letter to You which is I wrote but I don't think you can get to read this :

To: Maryn

Not to say I missed you so much, but I really want to know why you leave me without leaving me a word or somethings. I really don't know what happened... 30th November 2007, you still chat with me through phone happily and you said you will come visit me at 1st Dec 2007. I waiting you with the heart of joy, thus you made me disappointed. You even missing in action after that. I sms you, called you, msn you, contact your friends also unable to reach you. I really wonder why...

I was kind of pissed off and sad plus worry. I really don't know what happened to you. After 1 month, I saw you finally online but you din't even find me until I nudge you. I asked you what happened but you din't answer me. Isit you get another precious one there? because long distance relationship is hard for you and me? Or I had done somethings that you don't like or anythings? I really don't know... but I know that no way I can get the answer until you voice it out. However, I don't think you will...

Already passed 1 year plus 4 months, but you din't even show up... I still see you active at facebook, and I know u blocked my msn. Do you remember that you promise me to make me a very special present at my 21th birthday? I doubt you forget about it, maybe you had your love now. Even forget about me...

I admit that I don't really love you deeply. And I even give up loving you and I succeed to do that. I fall in love someone else now. However, what i can say is you are the best boy friend I ever had. Distinction in every aspects, not really very nice-looking but your attitude, manner, nearly all are perfect, alot better than the one I loving now... But one weakness, no matter what happened, you would never said it out until it's in critical situation.

I don't love you anymore, however, I really hope to know what's make you leave me without reasons. Because I don't want to be judged died without telling me the reason. I know you won't get to read this letter. But at least I can forget you completely after this. My life goes on and I promised myself to get better companions that would accompany me for the rest of my life... Thank you for everythings you've done before.

By Lavy

I'm so Blur as always...

2009-04-11T00:56:00.002+08:00

It's a great day when I found that all things go according on my plan. My mum cooked me some french fries for my lunch, the food I ever love... Yummy! I finish all of them XD...

After having my wonderful lunch, I went back to my College with my ex-classmate, Li ***** to certify some documents and walk around there to meet some old friends and lecturers. I miss the day I had in this college, my classmate, housemate and so on... Even miss my enemy, cause last time I always thought she is the worst creature I ever met. But now, i realize her case is just a tiny sand. Someone even worst than she was for now. However, I m glad that at the time we having "war", many of you standing on my side. Although some of you just be obsserver, after all it's past already.

I went to Gurney with Ms.Je***** at 6pm for the purpose of taking my celcom broadband to lend a ben dan, mr. K... Well, seriously... I m sick of going Gurney, almost everyday I m going there. I ate those deep fried squids, mantis prawnie, and so on at Gurney drive as my dinner with them. We wandering around the Plaza after having our dinner until 8+pm and finally we decide to go to Sunrise McD to play cards over there. Luckily today my luck still ok, pity to the same guy again... hahaha..

When we decide to going home, it's raining heavy~_~'' I was wearing high heels so it's quite hard for me to run over to my car as my car parked quite a distance from the entrance. Although he offer us that he run to take umbrella for us from my car, both girls still running to the car. Sorry for that as he had to waste his energy for running there and find umbrella... Well, Efforts appreciated=)...

Not really feeling well after putting myself running in the rain. But I m happy anyway... Wish you good luck there...=)

What's a Touching Manga...

2009-04-10T01:03:00.003+08:00

Today, I am so boring. So I decide to read some mangas on Onemanga.com... I continue the manga that I read half-way before, Hanatsuki Hime...

It's about a girl named Lys who borned without heart beat, so her mum make a trade or should say contract with a high level devil so that the devil will lend his heart to bring her back alive. The contract expired after 16 years later and the devil named Siva will take back his heart that time. However, Lys's mum passed away few months later after the deal. The villagers are very particular with the flower "tattoo" on her chest and locked her up. She was only 1 or 2 years old. Luckily Siva take care of her. However, Lys doesn't know that Siva was the devil who lend his heart to her. For a Devil, they can survive without a heart at 16 years... when reach 16 years they must get back the heart or else they will turn into monster and die. What happen when Lys reach 16 years old? Interest to know or read?? Click Here... Total 8 Volumes.. Short but nice...

Read this whole afternoon. Around 6 to 7, fetch my mum to buy fruit and flower for 2mr. I went to Prangin Mall with my friend and had our dinner there. It's been a while since I went there... Miss the day I worked there at the shoes gallery and the bear bear shop with that handsome... haha... Wonder are you doing well now...=)... We back to her home around 9pm and I fetch tat Ms.J aka Siao po back from work. She said she want to eat so I bring her to Boon hua kopitiam but what she eat is FRUIT! wth... really speechless lol... then i throw her back to her home. ~_~''

For now, I think I better don't think things about him. Just everythings goes naturally, or else I get hurt myself but he won't even know what's actually happen. As long as all of us happy, it's enough....=)

Lyric - T- shirt

2009-04-09T14:48:00.005+08:00

T-shirt By Shontelle Layne

Tryna decide, tryna decide if i

really wanna go out to night i

never use to go out without ya

not sure i remember how to.

Gonna be late, gonna be late but,

all my girls gon have to wait cause

don’t know if i like my outfit

i tried everything in my closet.

(Chorus)

Nothing feels right when I’m not with you

sick of this dress and these Jimmy Choo’s.

Taking them off cause I feel a fool

tryna dress up when I’m missin you.

Ima step out this lingerie

curl up in a ball with something Hanes.

In bed I lay

with nothing but your t-shirt on(2x)

Hey

gotta be strong, gotta be strong but I’m

really hurting now that your gone. I

thought maybe I’d do some shopping

but I couldn’t get past the door and,

now i dont know, now i dont know if I,

ever really gon let you go.

and I couldn’t even leave my apartment

stripped down torn up about it.

(Chorus)

Nothing feels right when I’m not with you,

Sick of this dress and these Jimmy Choo’s.

taking them off cause i feel a fool

tryna dress up when I’m missin you.

Ima step out this lingerie

curl up in a ball with something Hanes.

in bed I laywith nothing but your t-shirt on (I’m all by myself with)

with nothing but your t-shirt on

with nothing but your t-shirt on (cause i miss you, cause i miss you)

with nothing but your t-shirt on (said I missed you baby)

Now i don’t know, now i don’t if i

ever really gon letcha go. and i

couldn’t even leave my apartment

I’m stripped down torn up about it.

(Chorus)

Nothing feels right when I’m not with you

sick of this this dress and these Jimmy Choo’s.

Taking them off cause i feel a fool

tryna dress up when I’m missin you. (when i’m missing you)

imma step out this lingerie,

curl up in a ball with something Hanes. (oh, ooo)

In bed i lay.

Nothing feels right when i’m not with you

i’m sick of this dress and these Jimmy Choo’s.

Taking them off cause i feel a fool,

tryna dress up when i’m missin you. (cause i miss you)

Imma step out this lingerie

curl up in a ball with something Hanes, (promise if you do)

in bed i lay (imma be in bed)

with nothing but your t-shirt on

said i got nothing but your t-shirt on

(cause i wanna be close to you)

with nothing but you t-shirt on (I remember when you liked to see me with

with nothing but your t-shirt on

nothing but your t-shirt on.

hey, lemme tell ya now

nothing but your t-shirt on

Everyone Has Their Own Places to Belong with....

2009-04-09T00:16:00.002+08:00

My piece of Mind Today:
Some time I do admit that I like to think... sort of thinking too much... But I found out that everyone beside me has their place to belong, I mean like groups of friends or any club. Like they will always join a group of friends to share happiness and sadness together there. Sadly, I think I still standing there alone. I don't think I belong to any of them, sad isn't it? I don't really have a gang of friends that I really can share my happiness and sadness with. Everytime when I had any troubles, I have to settle it myself without any of them helping me... I feel sad sometime as if someone helped me to settle down it, that someone must be a new friend or someone that not really close with me... I pity on myself... Maybe that is my destiny for being alone? or the place that belongs to me still hasn't exist?
_____________________________________________________________________

8th April 2008

I only slept for 4 hours last night, from 2am to 6am... I can't sleep properly because somethings annoying me in my mind. Which is whether going down to KL and join my friends to Kampar onot. My dad don't allowed me go alone but my mum pleased me to go, feel like wth when trying to argue with them.

Login RO whole morning and trying to hunt some Eq like inflitrators and blue pot. Again I felt that I am a noob there=(... Last time I dare challenge them when they ks me or insult me, yet now how do I challenge them with the noob Eq i had? haha, funny... Better don't care those jerks.

Prepared going out around 2pm with J and K. Once reach Gurney, I feel hungry but I can't manage to finish my lunch because the chicken served is too salty>.<''' We had lunch with a quite quiet situation when K was on-fire about his salary problems. I tried to make the situation better but it seem that I failed. Well, luckily everythings is fine after that... Both of them even made out alot jokes with me, and disturb me drive!!!! zzzzz! "throw you out of the car then u know!!!"

We planned to go Queensbay and catch the movie around 5 pm but we failed again, once we reach there, the movie time not suit us at all... Give up that and walk around. Seriously I feel funny yet pissed off with these two crappers=.=''' 1 move fast 1 move slow, I am at the middle and don't know who shall I follow, so I decide to walk the slowest... hahaha
We went Tesco after I suggest to pay a visit on Mr. Lo***. Besides visiting him, I also went to Takashima and Bluecube to say Hello with them. I laughed when I heard they said J is my sister... Rofl!!! After having dinner at Chopper Board and next stop---> drops J back home for a bath and I got no choice but to follow K to his friend workplace.

We went to Gurney drive around 8 something to see mr.W and them. I thought mr.N will be there but what I saw is a gang of jerk there with mr.W. I don't really like the way they doing, pretending nubs or really nubs I don't know. Don't even want to care anyway...
Last stop--> Farlim's night market=.=''' Finally met Mr.N and Mr. H there lol, I m happy to see them but things not really goes easy. The pool password have been changed. I really kind of dissappointed with it because why another 1 quit the job, you did'nt change it and u change it after i quit? Because I m worse than tat idiot and not trustable enough? Everytime u said you 4gt change it when he leave, but why u remember to change it once I leave? It's not fair u know?
Maybe I shouldn't bother so much since I left.

Thx for both of you willing to going out with me, although the one who drive is me...lol...

Not a bad day After all =)

2009-04-08T01:33:00.009+08:00

Have been wake by my mum cause of the motor road-tax stuff... Seriously not enough sleep as i sleep at 4am yesterday. Who knows after I wake up and went to bath, my mum said no need to go le because her friend fetch her go... really wth>.<... If she said it earlier, I can get some sleep...

Login RO a while, chat with my tomato and friends then logout le. Although I said I want to play back but I really no idea and mood to play back like previously... Hunt the money and eq for pvp or woe?? I don't feel like Pvp and woe or even MVP... Cause I just want to chat with them only and trying to kill my free times with hunting those noob items and EQ...

Chat with friends at Msn after logout the game. Pity my dear friend, hope he can forget the things that made him sad and try to get a new life and forget the old 1... Wasting time on somethings already not belong to you is not a good idea after all =)... Cheer up friend... Not happy or wan a pair of ears? I welcome you anytime=)... Although I think I was the one keep complaining things about my life to you, thx for the willingness to listen my craps...

According to the earlier plan, I should go visit my friend at hospital at 5pm. However, he said he already out from there and rest at home. I hope he is alright with his leg, all the best to him. I went dinner with Ms.Je. I asked Mr.K along too as later-on we will met other of my ex-colleagues to drink coffee at bed. I m not in a very good condition as Im still half sick. So I create alot of funny jokes=.='' cause i blur blur>.<... We had dinner at Gurney Mc'D.

After drop Ms.Je and her mum, we went to Bed with "Siao po" and others(Mr. W and his gf). 2 of my colleagues give me a big aeroplane>.<... When reached there, I saw that girl again. Lol, forget about it. Don't really like to discuss things regarding that. Sorry if I m too direct but if I really don't like someone, I wont keep it or leave it. I will say it out. And I know tat siao po feel the same way as I am.

All the time, especially at previous workplace... I act noob and fool, but do you all think I m an idiot? If you think that way, I m glad that I am a quite good actress then. But my motive isn't bad anyway, I just want to communicate with other in a better way. Of cause I can't deny that I have no bad intention at all. However, I m glad that I got this chance get to know you all through this job. Really I am=)...

I look forward about 2mr's activities =)

友情 vs 愛情 - 幾米小品

2009-04-06T21:42:00.003+08:00

友誼：是你打他一巴掌…他會還你一巴掌。

愛情：則是會默默承受…且說「打是情、罵是愛」。

友誼：是他摟你的腰…會覺得太肉麻。

愛情：則是愈緊愈好…最好永遠不要分開。

友誼：說話時聲音如雷…不拘小節。

愛情：則是輕聲細語…動作溫柔…惟恐嚇到對方。

友誼：同床異夢。

愛情：夢裡相思。

友誼：三秋不見如隔一日。

愛情：一日不見如隔三秋。

友誼：上公車時…和你一起擠。

愛情：是護著你先上車。

友誼：一件事和你辯論到底。

愛情：任何事都是你對。

友誼：盼望能同年同月同日生。

愛情：則但願同年同明同日死。

友誼：吃飯時…菜單各看一本。

愛情：則是共同看一本菜單。

友誼：分手時說再見。

愛情：則是說「明天見」。

友誼：接到你的信時…明天再回信。

愛情：則是立刻、馬上回信…一刻都不願耽擱。

友誼：會大聲說我有很多朋友。

愛情：則會說只有一個你。

友誼：買一樣東西時…會說「沒眼光」。

愛情：則會說「你好眼力，會挑好的東西」。

友誼：笑會遙遠祝福你。

愛情：則是含淚遙遠思念你。

友誼：是將你的相片放在相簿中。

愛情：是會將相片隨身攜帶。

友誼：走路時保持距離。

愛情：則是沒有距離並且手拉手。 #

I get it from Email again. It's help you to identify the differences between friends and love.

By reading this, I knew that I really hopeless already. Praying for a better tomorrow or rather, A better target soon? hahaha....

Well, enjoy=)

Lyric - You Belong With me

2009-04-06T19:53:00.003+08:00

By Taylor Swift

You're on the phone with your girlfriend

She's upset

She's going off about something that you said

'Cuz she doesn't get your humor like I do...

I'm in the room

It's a typical Tuesday night

I'm listening to the kind of music she doesn't like

And she'll never know your story like I do'

But she wears short skirts

I wear T-shirts

She's cheer captain

And I'm on the bleachers

Dreaming about the day when you wake up

And find that what you're looking for has been here the whole time

If you could see that I'm the one who understands you

Been here all along so why can't you see

You belong with me

Walk in the streets with you and your worn-out jeans

I can't help thinking this is how it ought to be

Laughing on a park bench, thinking to myself

Hey isn't this easy?

And you've got a smile that could light up this whole town

I haven't seen it in a while since she brought you down

You say your fine

I know you better than that

Hey whatcha doing with a girl like that

She wears high heels

I wear sneakers

She's cheer captain and I'm on the bleachers

Dreaming about the day when you wake up

And find that what you're looking for has been here the whole time

If you could see that I'm the one who understands you

Been here all along so why can't you see

You belong with me

Standing by and waiting at your back door

All this time how could you not know

Baby...

You belong with me

Oh'

I remember you drivin' to my house in the middle of the night

I'm the one who makes you laugh

When you know you're about to

And I know your favorite songs

And you tell me about your dreams

I think I know where you belong

I think I know it's with me...

Can't you see that I'm the one who understands you

Been here all along

So why can't you see

You belong with me

Standing by and waiting at your back door

All this time

How could you not know

Baby you belong with me

You belong with me

Have you ever thought just maybe

You belong with me?

======================================================

Another song's lyric there~

Hope you all like it

Lyric - Say Hello

2009-04-06T18:35:00.002+08:00

<> By Rosie Thomas

One two three four

If I find him, I'll fine just to follow
Would he hold me and never let me go
Would he let me borrow his old winter coat
I don't know, I don't know

If I see her standing there alone
At the train station three stops from her home
I have half a mind to say what I'm thinking anyway
But I don't know, I don't know

There's an airplane in the sky,
With the banner right behind
Loneliness is just a crime
Look each other in the eye

And Say Hello, oh oh oh oh
And say hello, oh oh oh, oh oh

Hey there, how u doing?
Hi, my name's Mary, hi...

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

Well, that's the lyric for my playlist beside -->

Hope you all enjoy =)

Another Dizzy day

2009-04-06T02:06:00.002+08:00

Woke up with a dizzy face, my flu is getting worst and I felt headache and blur. Lying on bed for hours before I can get up and continue my daily stuffs. Read books and playing online games whole afternoon. Back to RO again, thanks for those who concern and take care my IDs before. =)...

I went out at evening and had dinner with my friend. We ate XXX( I know if i write it, i sure get scold=.=''), however I feel better at evening although I still very blur when I drive to my friend's house and nearly bang the car behind me=.='''

Haiz, I miss someone... Sad to say but it's so hard to give up all about him, arghhh... Why just I cant straight away get a new life and forget about him???? No, i think I shouldn't force myself to forget about him. Just let it goes naturally I guess. Everytime I think about the moments we having, it really give me a sweet memories... =)

Hopefully my flu please faster recover>.< I don't want it to ruin my dayT___T

Dizzy day~

2009-04-05T01:52:00.002+08:00

I woke at 7am... Very early for me. Cant sleep well because of my sore throat and I have to fetch my mum go market and help her out on the praying ceremony. Until 11am, after I finish helping my mum, finally I can get some sleep. My flu and sore throat getting worst btw. However, while I was sleeping, the ringing tone wake me up... Is the stupid customer again~_~..well god, I really fed up with that...

I have to go Queensbay get RM50 from my supervisor and bring it to Tesco to another supevisor to settle off this stuff. Luckily I ate medicine that can temporarily control my flu from being worst and I was quite tired driving. Today I totally went to 3 malls. Queensbay-->Tesco-->Gurney... ohya and 1 more...sunshine farlim... I m glad that I managed to go so many places with my current condition. And thank to the make-up, I don't look pale and sick.

I was planning to have my dinner over the taiwan restaurant but I fail to make it due to the time I reach gurney is already 9pm++. So I had my dinner at 600cc which is...1 word...SUCK! I cant finish my meal because it's tasteless, maybe because I sick bah... Went with 2 persons. I m blur bluring whole day due to my flu~_~

After fetch my friend's mum back home, we went to Bed as ms.Je din't go there before. Playing Big 2 there, lose quite alot but cant compare to another poor guy...hahaha... I drank coffee there so I guess tonight I don't have to sleep already~_~
When we on the way back home, we saw an accident... The front part of the car is almost gone case, hopefully the driver and the victims will be alright...

Hope that my flu and sore throat will be better 2mr so I don't have to waste so many tissue papers~_~

就这样的一天

2009-04-04T00:32:00.004+08:00

几乎每一天都是用英文，今天我却心血来潮想用中文。

今天对我而言好像是四个月前的生活，可今天所想的事物和四个月前大大不同了，关键就在这四个月里的一切改变了我。

四个月前的生活比较单纯，除了gaming 还是gaming，而那时的我脑海里是空虚的，只想当初为什么Maryn会不告而别，是因为他在那儿有了别个比我好的女生吗？不明白为什么。可能对他而言我不是一个好情人吧？

四个月里，开始工作在一间电讯公司，放弃了每天对着电脑gaming的习惯。认识了不少人，当然有好的也有不太好的。好的我会称他们为朋友，不太好的就称同事好了。在工作上，我每做一样事都想得很远，为了自己在工作上不被派侧。我好怕会给别人看不起，也不喜欢有“自己一个人”的感觉，还好一切都蛮好的。最糟的还是，自己掉入了陷阱。喜欢了一个人。。。不过放心的是，我不想让任何人知道。自己明知道暗恋是件难过的事，却明知故犯

四个月后的我，还好好的；没穿没烂。辞职了，在家里无所事事。每天看见家人的争吵，让我有不想呆在家的感觉，可我能怎样呢？想天天都不要在家里，在外面；可是我不喜欢自己一个人，因为我怕一个人的感觉。觉得自己很没用。。。

今天下了一场大雨，有一种很想去淋雨的冲动；想把一切不开心的事忘掉，但是妈妈要我载她去朋友家~真是的=(...喉咙不舒服了整天，吃了一块炸鸡排，现在终于病了，头好疼哦！

不写了，大家晚安

It's a Miss or release for you when I choose to leave?

2009-04-03T01:31:00.002+08:00

It's 4th day I have been stopped this job... Somehow I feel like I m still unable to get used with the life now. Before get this job, I always gaming and gaming. Because of this job, I give up all my Online games and now i quitted this job. I don't know what I can do everyday? Hanging around with friends? but everyday going out is not a good idea also... Play back those games? I don't feel i got the gaming mood already, felt tired... Really don't know what to do...>.<

Today, I was plan to have a last gathering for the sake of these few friends as they going to study at KL and other places. Sadly I feel that I fail to organize it and at last I have to cancel it. However, I still hanged around with Jxxxx and Kxxx. From 5pm to 8 something. We were like flies without head, as we don't have actual destination or way to go. Boring but still ok ba, I have to appreciate every single moment that I spend with them since I m going to Kampar soon... I quite worry though...

Just 1 more month to go and I m leaving Penang and going to Kampar... I m afraid that I will very sad at the moment i leave. Should I stay a distance with them now-on so that I wont be extremely sad at the day I leave? Or shall I spend more times with my friends while I am around? Well, honestly I really appreciate every single moments that I spent with them... Am I able to forget him after I left? 1/2 hoping but 1/2 not hoping that happen, however, it seem that I have no idea anyway... haiz...

Another worry is, when I go to Kampar... Who willing to listen to my "bible" when I want to talk or chat with someone? Wondering... Hell, its bugged me for long...

>.<....Help.......

~(^_^)~

haiz....

1st post for Nov

Cherish Blossom~

No more...

一生人的遗憾

你不属于我

The One that I worry about... still u...

SS501 coming to KL,malaysia...

Because I'm Stupid (translated)

I am who I am...

You're still my best piggy ^^

The truth is I'm not excluded too...

I like the way....now

Pretty tired friday~

Going back to Penang

"Incredible's" Feeling...

Unwanted Birthday

For memories...

Good Bye IvaliceRO....

Sweet and happy time doesn't stay long...

I am back to my lovely Penang

H1N1

Wishes turned into disappointment...

A star... that gonna explode soon

I strongly agree and it's straight describe what I feel...

Stress and sad...

You're still the best guy I ever meet....

It's complicated..

Sick like a half dead fish...

2 days at home...

Went back to Penang today~

两个cases...

Worst Weekend ever I guess

1st day to attend lecture class...

I hate the weather here....

Tired but full of jokes...

Back to Kampar, but mind was still stuck at Penang...

Going back tomorrow...

My nightmare...

You're the same...

Worthless and wasted day...

Nice day~~~<3 Penang

New environment, new friends, new life but old problems

My first day staying at westlake,Kampar

Unreachable one...

Am I A boring person to You?

Stupid Brown Skinner Ruinned my mood!

I Just Wanna be myself...

没有公平的世界、只有残酷的一切

I am too kind? lol...

Lovely Day~

Yesterday plus today~

Rest In Peace to my ex-neighbour aunty

You will be always in my heart...

Count Down... 8 days left...

2nd time to Kampar but 1st time to Utar

Not much traffic jams, lucky~

Happy Wesak Day~

I love My daddy =)

Money Isn't Important, But No money is Important!

Beer...sick...@@''

First time to Kampar....So S***

U don't know that I care everything about YOU

Are you watching me from heaven?

Dead Meat

Almost granted all....

*___*

Bor, Bore, Bored, Boring...

Time doesn't wait and never stop...

我还真没用，对吗？

Pretty Day

Endless Problems attacking me...

Maxis --> Omfg

No Fuels...

女生们不能错过的十种男生

Missing the old days

Cleaning and cleaning, hope I could clean my hurts as well...

Hyper Hot and Heat~_~''

Another bored one...

___