I feel pain, not on physical wound, but it is from my heart.
Today I realize, what hurt the most is not unable to forget the one that u have been together before, like X-bf/gf. As the memories left could shape reviews for you and your past. And at least, you had been together with your x-bf or x-gf before. Mostly the reason to break up is from both of them and it has to be one of them doing wrong things and end up with bye bye.
Well, WHAT’s HURT ME THE MOST is I can’t tell the one I love about my feeling to him. And every time he does some things that hurt me deeply without knowing that it is hurting me. I love him, secretly…
I am lack of courage to let him know about it. I scared when he knows it, he will stay away from me, ever further than the current situations. Although it is happenning in few months, I just don't know why my feeling had gone so deep until I will jeolous another person that close to him. I hate this feeling! Too bad, he don't even know I loving him... Every time I joked him with other, I feel I was like taking a knife and piercing my own heart. Must pretend that I don't care him with my fake smile.
I promise myself to give up since it is a wish that is quite impossible to grant. And I thought that I am able to give up! However, I fail to do so. Get myself a new BF to forget him? I just don't know what to do! Ya, give up! give up! All told me to give up, yeap! Of cause i want to give up! but i can't>.<'''
I always scold myself, Why don't I just tell him that i love/like him?! But I am afraid that he will abandon me and get close to other girl excluding me. I knew that to him, I am just a normal friend like the other do. And today i realize that too. The way he treat me, he could treat other girl same too. haiz....
Endless pain I have to bear again! Why?! Haiz....
Today I realize, what hurt the most is not unable to forget the one that u have been together before, like X-bf/gf. As the memories left could shape reviews for you and your past. And at least, you had been together with your x-bf or x-gf before. Mostly the reason to break up is from both of them and it has to be one of them doing wrong things and end up with bye bye.
Well, WHAT’s HURT ME THE MOST is I can’t tell the one I love about my feeling to him. And every time he does some things that hurt me deeply without knowing that it is hurting me. I love him, secretly…
I am lack of courage to let him know about it. I scared when he knows it, he will stay away from me, ever further than the current situations. Although it is happenning in few months, I just don't know why my feeling had gone so deep until I will jeolous another person that close to him. I hate this feeling! Too bad, he don't even know I loving him... Every time I joked him with other, I feel I was like taking a knife and piercing my own heart. Must pretend that I don't care him with my fake smile.
I promise myself to give up since it is a wish that is quite impossible to grant. And I thought that I am able to give up! However, I fail to do so. Get myself a new BF to forget him? I just don't know what to do! Ya, give up! give up! All told me to give up, yeap! Of cause i want to give up! but i can't>.<'''
I always scold myself, Why don't I just tell him that i love/like him?! But I am afraid that he will abandon me and get close to other girl excluding me. I knew that to him, I am just a normal friend like the other do. And today i realize that too. The way he treat me, he could treat other girl same too. haiz....
Endless pain I have to bear again! Why?! Haiz....
3:00 AM |
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